Do people behave genuinely on the Internet?

[Insomniac]

Here we are talking to one another about philosophy, politics, and porn. Often rude, but usually pleasant.

Who are we talking to?

For the most part, strangers. All over the nation and world, we're communicating with people we'd probably never interact with otherwise, but they're here and we're interacting. But that doesn't really answer the question because if we had to deal with everyone else in real life, we likely wouldn't recognize one another. You can't behave in the physical world the way most of us do in the cyber world, for a variety of reasons.

But which one is real?

Are we behaving genuinely on the Internet because it's free from consequences, are we behaving how we'd like to be able to act? Are our practical constraints part of what make us who we are, or do they hold us back?

You can be a rude, abrasive asshole on GMF without worrying someone will punch you in the face. You can say you'd like to fuck a four-year-old in the ass without worrying you'll lose your job. So is this where you are who you are or where you go to be someone else?

[Kerjack]

I think it falls to the middle, probably closer to the 'someone else' side though simply because of the restrictions felt by text being the primary medium. One that I have a horrendous time trying to convey an accurate portrait of anything with.

[Claibo]

Ego has to be inflated due to the lack of consequece

[nuclearjew]

Ego has to be inflated due to the lack of consequece
Whoa, you just blew my mind.

[Archetype]

Anyone with a brain still understands that there's consequence on the internet. GMF is probably a good example where we don't just let anybody walk around with an ingenuine attitude. Granted, we've pussied down a bit over time, but even with guys like taters posting in every politics thread, there's a smaller degree of jackassery compared to youtube or virtually every other forum out there. I think it's a Lincoln quote that says no man has a good enough memory to be a good liar; you can try all you want to paint a picture of yourself, but without some reference to who you actually are, it'll fail miserably. Well, either that or you manage to develop a niche.

[redsox39]

I think it is in the real world where I have to tone it down a bit, and places like GMF really allow me to state what I feel. that being said, most people think I am an alcoholic sex fiend in real life too...so...good thing they don't come here!

[Smuckers]

Interesting post,and it is something I have thought about a lot. I act differnt on the internet, and if people knew me in real life they would be surprised I post the stuff I do and probably would think I had some type of mental illness. Lets just say if my mom/dad knew I was posting on here, read the stuff I posted and what other people post, it would be more shocking then when I got caught looking at porn in 5th grade. Also, when people on here found out I was bi, they had no problem calling me a faggot, telling me to kill myself, etc. But if you knew me IRL, would you call me a faggot to my face? Didn't think so.

[WET HOT MESS]

Genuineness is a really rare thing. To ever come by it at all is uncommon to begin with. Some people will say stuff like fuck it, this is who I am, I am real, all that crap, but people still have reserves for what they want. Behind all that unrefined crassness in a lot of people here and other forums and internet communities, there is probably plot, not necessarily malicious, but it's still there. I know before this place developed into how it is today, new folks will suck up to the admins, the mods, the vets, the regulars, hoping for brownie points and acceptance. After that, they showed their real colors. Some nice people turned out to be complete dickheads, some morons turned out to be pretty intelligent. To some degree, depending on which subject(s) touches our lives the most, we may project a genuine feeling that does translate across, but the most part, I'd say every single one of us here is a fat liar.

[Archetype]

I know before this place developed into how it is today, new folks will suck up to the admins, the mods, the vets, the regulars, hoping for brownie points and acceptance.
I think I did.

[WET HOT MESS]

You had art as your niche, which wasn't so bad. Some people really had nothing to offer. And still don't.

[Nature's Folly]

In reality i'm even more awesome and rude.

[Phil Theehor]

The way you behave here, just as in any situation, is determined the value you put on the relationships.

I enjoy interactions with a number of people on this forum-- even the people with whom I disagree. As a result, I won't go out of my way to break anyone's balls more than I would a real-life friend. Actually, because there remains a written record of what is said, I choose my words here more carefully than IRL.

That said, if someone is obviously just passing through here (and they're easy to spot), I might throw out a few choice words. The aim, however, is usually not to make the individual feel poorly, but rather to entertain the other members. And Insomniac is correct there. IRL, I would merely disregard these folks.

To echo RedSox, I am probably more honest here than I am in daily life. If I ever fuck-up royally here, I can just close the browser window and move on with real life.

[Limp]

I am only about 50% "the real me" here.

The real me is 100% awesome.

[Tar Heel]

Here we are talking to one another about philosophy, politics, and porn. Often rude, but usually pleasant.

Who are we talking to?

For the most part, strangers. All over the nation and world, we're communicating with people we'd probably never interact with otherwise, but they're here and we're interacting. But that doesn't really answer the question because if we had to deal with everyone else in real life, we likely wouldn't recognize one another. You can't behave in the physical world the way most of us do in the cyber world, for a variety of reasons.

But which one is real?

Are we behaving genuinely on the Internet because it's free from consequences, are we behaving how we'd like to be able to act? Are our practical constraints part of what make us who we are, or do they hold us back?

You can be a rude, abrasive asshole on GMF without worrying someone will punch you in the face. You can say you'd like to fuck a four-year-old in the ass without worrying you'll lose your job. So is this where you are who you are or where you go to be someone else?

I tend to unleash my inner asshole a little more on GMF, but not much. I'm pretty much this awesome most of the time.

[Phil Theehor]

Interesting post,and it is something I have thought about a lot. I act differnt on the internet, and if people knew me in real life they would be surprised I post the stuff I do and probably would think I had some type of mental illness. Lets just say if my mom/dad knew I was posting on here, read the stuff I posted and what other people post, it would be more shocking then when I got caught looking at porn in 5th grade. Also, when people on here found out I was bi, they had no problem calling me a faggot, telling me to kill myself, etc. But if you knew me IRL, would you call me a faggot to my face? Didn't think so.

Not true.

Most guys, Smuck, call their buddies faggots 9 or 10,000 times before the age of 21.

But to your point, IRL I wouldn't call an actual gay a faggot unless a) he was baiting me or b) he was a really good friend who happened to love the cock.

And I think you have to chalk up your harsh treatment to hazing (and your disregard for the written and unwritten rules of the forum). Everyone new gets hazed a bit. In your case, your admission of peen kissing gave the assembled miscreants a particularly easy hazing tool.

And it's not as though you didn't play into it, either. Adding the dood thread to the babe forum was one of the loudest cries for (negative) attention I've seen here.

That said, don't put too much stock into the abuse. I read a number of times that your unique perspective was missed during your ban.

[Archetype]

And I call all of those people who said such things, faggotholes. Faggotholes!

[Smuckers]

Not true.

And it's not as though you didn't play into it, either. Adding the dood thread to the babe forum was one of the loudest cries for (negative) attention I've seen here.

That said, don't put too much stock into the abuse. I read a number of times that your unique perspective was missed during your ban.

LOL, that is funny. I forgot about making that thread. But honestly, I wasn't doing it for attention (even though no one will believe me). It got deleted within 2 minutes, haha. The reason I made it was because people told me to stop posting men in the Random Pics thread , so I decided to make a men thread so people wouldnt have to look at it (unless they chose to http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/images/wink.gif) I really wasn't expecting it to be deleted, because I am sure some female (and male??) posters would appreciate it. Thanks for bringing it up though, it was pretty funny remembering the reactions, especially EG. http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/images/tongue.gif

I believe you when you say you wouldn't call me a faggot IRL, and honestly, I don't think most guys on here would. I was just trying to point out that people will insult people on the internet in ways that they wouldn't in real life. (Not to say I haven't said things on here that I wouldn't say either, though). Truthfully, though, people calling me a faggot because I openly admitted that I find men attractive, even though I didn't come on to any poster (and never would), didn't bother me at all, because we all are just bored people on here and I know most people are joking. I am sure 98% of people on here couldn't care less if I was gay. I don't really don't dislike any poster on here, even if one insults me alot.

I've had an old friend in real life, who I was great friends with for 8 years, completly cut off ties with me, ignore me, simply because he knew that I liked men. It hurt, because I really liked the guy. :(

Sorry for the http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/images/rant.gif This isn't about being gay, or whatever...but definitely fits the subject of this thread. http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/images/thumbsup.gif

[Archetype]

For instance, taters is a stupid ******. oh noes!

[Phil Theehor]

LOL, that is funny. I forgot about making that thread. But honestly, I wasn't doing it for attention (even though no one will believe me). It got deleted within 2 minutes, haha. The reason I made it was because people told me to stop posting men in the Random Pics thread , so I decided to make a men thread so people wouldnt have to look at it (unless they chose to http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/images/wink.gif) I really wasn't expecting it to be deleted, because I am sure some female (and male??) posters would appreciate it. Thanks for bringing it up though, it was pretty funny remembering the reactions, especially EG. http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/images/tongue.gif

I believe you when you say you wouldn't call me a faggot IRL, and honestly, I don't think most guys on here would. I was just trying to point out that people will insult people on the internet in ways that they wouldn't in real life. (Not to say I haven't said things on here that I wouldn't say either, though). Truthfully, though, people calling me a faggot because I openly admitted that I find men attractive, even though I didn't come on to any poster (and never would), didn't bother me at all, because we all are just bored people on here and I know most people are joking. I am sure 98% of people on here couldn't care less if I was gay. I don't really don't dislike any poster on here, even if one insults me alot.

I've had an old friend in real life, who I was great friends with for 8 years, completly cut off ties with me, ignore me, simply because he knew that I liked men. It hurt, because I really liked the guy. :(

Sorry for the http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/images/rant.gif This isn't about being gay, or whatever...but definitely fits the subject of this thread. http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/images/thumbsup.gif

Sorry about your friend. That is shitty.

But on another subject, we could really do without all of the smileys. The English language has a wide array of punctuation marks that do the job just fine.

[freegood]

We get something out of here that we don't get in real life.

In my case, the exception would be the hot naked chicks.

[DjAg]

Am I the only one finding it hard to comment? I act no differently between real life and the internet... The only times I act differently is depending on the circumstances of my audience, which is the true difference maker. I think if someone were to reveal comments I make when I pos/neg members, they would probably see that my comments to lady GMF'ers are consistently different than to male GMF'ers, in that they are likely more flirty and light. Internet vs. real life poses no noticeable affects on my behavior... Not to say that I am 100% truthful or genuine, but that is my #1 goal in life and I see my indifference along many of these situations to be evidence of my growth in this aspect.

And anyways, when it comes down to it, considering your audience is a necessity in expressing oneself in both showing acknowledgement/understanding of the situation/audience as well as showing some class/tact. Without SOME sacrifice in genuineness, it may prove impossible to gain an audience to respect ANY amount of the genuine you.

So, I'd say no. It is impossible to act genuinely to the fullest and most consistent extent, but I'd say, at least in my case and many of my friends' case, internet vs. real life makes no difference in that level of genuineness.

[Aegis]

I find that on the internet I can actually be myself whereas in real life speaking my mind sometimes would be inappropriate. Although sometimes it does serve as a great medium to let out some steam and be a complete and total asshole without consequence.

[Archetype]

Who are you, again?

[Aegis]

Not a n00b!

[Smuckers]

Great avatar.

[Archetype]

Not a n00b!
By 11 posts to boot.

[Aegis]

11 quality posts!

[medlar]

I am actually 100% more awesome in real life I just have to limit myself online since I don't want people to die from my awesomeness all around the world instead of just a couple of people dying when I go outside..
It is me you are seeing online and I am an ass IRL too . I'll be upfront here and now when it comes to the few cyber sessions I seek out..I don't behave genuinely For different reasons. I have lied about my age and I am 6'4 and massively endowed.

I don't get why people are different online. Well I do if one is that sad in real life to have to alter personal facts and personality a social failure..Anonymity isn't true on the interwebs anymore. If anything your persolality is shown on the net. If you would bitch someone out online that is more truth to your inner feelings than putting up a fucking brave face in person w/ a fake smile and a backstabbing attitude. And if you can't put up with getting it back, thats pretty sad if you take the internet that seriously. Bonus you can ask the questions you wouldn't face to face and get at least 15% valid advice or confirmation back. the rest you lol at.

I'm currently blazed and feeling pretty up on the topic.

[Morfin]

I am actually 100% more awesome in real life.

I would hope so.

[Archetype]

Doesn't 100% more awesome just mean twice as awesome? So, what, that would make Medlar, 3 feet tall?

[Morfin]

Here is my real-life example of how the people act on the Internet.

Last week, my son had a hockey tournament and all the parents were standing around waiting for the next game to start. Someone asked how soon until our team plays. I responded, "Just a few minutes, they're zamboni-ing the ice now."

One of the moms then proceeded to explain to me that "zamboni" is not a verb, that the "ice resurfacer used by that rink was an Olympia, that the proper term is "resurfacing the ice," and that she knew someone in the Zamboni family.

I, of course, wanted to punch her, or at least verbally-berate her -- but I couldn't due to social mores. If that had happened on the Internet, I would have been able to tell her to STFU, berate her in writing, neg her, etc.

The Internet is a fantasy world unrestricted by those social limitations that society (and we) place on ourselves. We are free to speak our minds exactly how we want to. We are free to create our personas to be as we cannot be in real life, i.e., macho, tough-guy, know-it-alls.

[Archetype]

The Internet is a fantasy world unrestricted by those social limitations that society (and we) place on ourselves. We are free to speak our minds exactly how we want to. We are free to create our personas to be as we cannot be in real life, i.e., macho, tough-guy, know-it-alls.

Maybe, but I think Crack is proof that it isn't necessarily gonna be successful.

[freegood]

Here is my real-life example of how the people act on the Internet.

Last week, my son had a hockey tournament and all the parents were standing around waiting for the next game to start. Someone asked how soon until our team plays. I responded, "Just a few minutes, they're zamboni-ing the ice now."

One of the moms then proceeded to explain to me that "zamboni" is not a verb, that the "ice resurfacer used by that rink was an Olympia, that the proper term is "resurfacing the ice," and that she knew someone in the Zamboni family.

I, of course, wanted to punch her, or at least verbally-berate her -- but I couldn't due to social mores. If that had happened on the Internet, I would have been able to tell her to STFU, berate her in writing, neg her, etc.


So the next day, did you you give her a printout of Wikipedia on zambonis...Then you took a Polariod of her and wrote FAIL with a black sharpie.

amirite?

[Charlatan]

I think that most people define themselves through their interactions with other people and the limitations of their environment. Rather than be their own person, they conform to others' expectations, or try to confound others' expectations, which is really just another way to conform. Very few people permit themselves to be genuine, but for those that do, it doesn't really matter if it's on the internet or in the workplace.

[Archetype]

http://www.windycitizen.com/moms_minivan_conformist.jpg

[IHaveNone]

Absolutely not. The internet has become a place for people to hide and act in ways they wouldn't normally. This is especially true in confrontational circumstances.