GI Joe: Rise of Cobra

[taters]

I so so SO hope it doesnt destroy a cartoon I once enjoyed (pure nostalgia). Once I saw the names "marlon wayans" together with 'Ripcord', I cant help but being skeptical.

http://www.gijoemovie.com/ - for slower trailer
http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=52443 - A little faster

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1046173/

An elite military unit comprised of special operatives known as G.I. Joe, operating out of The Pit, takes on an evil organization led by a notorious arms dealer.



Dennis Quaid ... General Hawk

Channing Tatum ... Duke

Marlon Wayans ... Ripcord

Sienna Miller ... The Baroness

Joseph Gordon-Levitt ... Cobra Commander

Saïd Taghmaoui ... Breaker

Christopher Eccleston ... Destro

Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje ... Heavy Duty
other cast:

Rachel Nichols ... Shana 'Scarlett' O'Hara

Ray Park ... Snake Eyes

Jonathan Pryce ... U.S. President

Arnold Vosloo ... Zartan

Brandon Soo Hoo ... Young Storm Shadow

Karolina Kurkova ... Courtney A. Kreiger / Cover girl

Byung-hun Lee ... Storm Shadow

Courtney Fleming ... Security Tech

Leo Howard ... Young Snake Eyes

Jabbaar George ... Viper Guard


Thoughts?

[jax]

that trailer caught me off guard when I saw it on TV.

Awesome. I'm hoping this turns out like a transformers, which was enjoyable without ruining it, I think.

[Jericho]

Joseph Gordon Levitt as the Cobra Commander? What? And it's got Marlon Wayans in it. I dunno about all this

[Mustard]

Yeah. The addition of any Wayans family member pretty much guarantees a movie will never achieve greatness.

[Kerjack]

Keenen Ivory Wayans and Damon are both actually pretty good. Its those other two...

[bpb]

For the sake of my childhood, I hope it does well.

[Archangel]

Yeah. The addition of any Wayans family member pretty much guarantees a movie will never achieve greatness.

Um, Requiem for a Dream was pretty damned good.

[Archangel]

Also, why is the US president played by a Welshman?

[Jericho]

Although Rachel Nichols tits have had me in a trace ever since I watched P2

[Gary_Busey]

Because it's a movie.

[jax]

Although Rachel Nichols tits have had me in a trace ever since I watched P2

I think you might be the only one to see that movie

[Archangel]

Because it's a movie.
Yeah, but you rarely have an American playing the Prime Minister.Although Rachel Nichols tits have had me in a trace ever since I watched P2
Was that that parking garage flick? I remember seeing a trailer; is it any good?

[Nature's Folly]

Looks good to me.

[taters]

Sienna Miller as Baroness? I dont see it.

1- She should be eastern european or at least middle easternish/caucasic
2- She doesnt have the 'hot super genuis dominatrix' thing going for her.

http://www.collider.com/uploads/imageGallery/GI_Joe_Movie/baroness_gi_joe_rise_of_cobra_promotional_poster.j pg

http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/1356/baroness2.gif

She might be able to pull if off if they change her getup. BRING BACK THE OLD GLASSES. Better the proto-Tina Fey look than the nuevo-kareem abdul jabbar look.

[Mustard]

Yeah. The addition of any Wayans family member pretty much guarantees a movie will never achieve greatness.

Um, Requiem for a Dream was pretty damned good.
I said pretty much, see? I'm giving it a chance to not suck.

[Pax Britannia]

Also, why is the US president played by a Welshman?

He played Rupert Murdoch pretty well in 'Tomorrow Never Dies'.

[Jericho]

Yeah, but you rarely have an American playing the Prime Minister.
Was that that parking garage flick? I remember seeing a trailer; is it any good?
No. No it isn't. It was on Starz late one night, and her tits...just kinda hooked me

[Ethix]

Huh...it actually didn't look too bad. Snake-Eyes flipping over that car was pretty badass too.

[comicfan]

I have some real high hopes for this movie. I think it could be good. The trailer did not look that bad at all.

[Archetype]

Van Damme isn't in it, and neither is Kylie Minogue, so....

[comicfan]

was van damme suppose to be in it?

[Archetype]

Street Fighter

[Jericho]

Way to not get the joke.

[comicfan]

I am pretty slow with the uptake usually.

[Hodge]

Van Damme sure, someone is going to have to explain Kylie Minogue to me though. Not that I'm opposed to flaming hot, middle aged, one-titted redheads.

[Lone Wolf]

I'm all for Simon Adebisi/Mr Eko playing Heavy Duty

I imagine this thing will suck

[Archetype]

Van Damme sure, someone is going to have to explain Kylie Minogue to me though. Not that I'm opposed to flaming hot, middle aged, one-titted redheads.
http://www.alan-noon.com/misc/SFTM/SFTM_Cammy_Minogue.jpg

[Lone Wolf]

She's only got one tit?

[nuclearjew]

Breast cancer

[Mr. Brown]

After seeing this and then the land of the lost ad, I think my childhood needs the number to a good rape counselor

[Hodge]

http://www.alan-noon.com/misc/SFTM/SFTM_Cammy_Minogue.jpg
OH GOD YES.

[WET HOT MESS]

This could end horribly.

[Jericho]

This could end horribly.
Marlon Wayons

[Archetype]

Marlon Wayons
He's gonna be the next Heath Ledger. Just you wait.

[Mr. Brown]

how are they going to explain how a 27 year old becomes the head of the worlds most dangerous terrorist organization giving orders to Raymond Calitri?

[WET HOT MESS]

Marlon Wayons
He was amazing in Requiem. The man is legit. But any movie that considers Sienna Miller is iffy. Besides, they probably aren't gunna fit enough awesomeness from one of the greatest cartoons ever into a 2 hour movie. I don't like being all hyped up then socked in the stomach with disappointments.

[Jericho]

Requiem was forever ago. He's now an official Wayans that does Wayans Bros. shit

[Face]

Requiem was forever ago. He's now an official Wayans that does Wayans Bros. shit
your mom is a wayans brother

[Jericho]

your mom is a wayans brother
My mom is Damon

[Archetype]

He was amazing in Requiem. The man is legit. But any movie that considers Sienna Miller is iffy. Besides, they probably aren't gunna fit enough awesomeness from one of the greatest cartoons ever into a 2 hour movie. I don't like being all hyped up then socked in the stomach with disappointments.
I don't appreciate all the Sienna Miller hate going on here. No movie that has her and Rachel Nichols in leather can be all bad.

[Face]

My mom is Damon
a bald dude that shoved adam sandler's face in a shitty toilet bowl?

[justhere]

The trailer looks pretty cool.

[Face]

thank you for your keen insight, mr smarty-pants

[Archangel]

I don't appreciate all the Sienna Miller hate going on here. No movie that has her and Rachel Nichols in leather can be all bad.

What he said. Also, I bloody loved Layer Cake, and really liked Stardust.

[}{arlequin]

+1 for sienna/rachel combo. if it's gonna suck, might as well have something fun to look at (just think of the newly inspired halloween costumes!)


really... i hope no one who is going to see this is expecting to witness any actual acting. plus, w/ as many characters as they hope to throw in there, in a span of two hours a lot of them may have <10 min of screen time.

[ShitBreak]

I really can't remember a teaser trailer that looked equally retarded AND awesome at the same time.

Therefore, this movie intrigues, yet confuses me.

[VoxAngelikus]

really... i hope no one who is going to see this is expecting to witness any actual acting. plus, w/ as many characters as they hope to throw in there, in a span of two hours a lot of them may have <10 min of screen time.

Add to this quote the fact that Stephen Sommers is directing this movie, and I expect a Great Dane sized piece of dogshit.

I used to have intricate G.I. Joe battles when I was a kid, complete with storylines, character interaction, and the physical scarring of the toys, usually with matches, a lighter or a Joe/Cobra vehicle with figures inside, doused in gasoline with a long trail from the parking lot across the street to my driveway (for dramatic effect). I have a feeling that this movie will be very disappointing.

What's that? Joseph Gordon Levitt as Cobra Commander?

I'm out.

[}{arlequin]

Therefore, this movie intrigues, yet confuses me.

a buffet line confuses you too so that's not saying much

[Bizz]

Anything with ninjas can't be all bad.

[The Batman]

I just want to see how they do Destro and Cobra Commander. Will they give Destro that mask? If they do, will he look completely stupid? And Cobra Commander, there have been no pictures or anything, so is this something that will show up in a sequel or are they keeping it quiet?

[arod2105]

I thought it looked pretty good from the brief spot we saw yesterday. Can't wait to see more footage and trailers as we get closer to the release date. With the Transformers spot and the G.I. Joe spot, it takes me back to when I was young.

[smith42687]

What's that? Joseph Gordon Levitt as Cobra Commander?

I'm out.

He's the next Heath Ledger. lol

[redsox39]

a buffet line confuses you too so that's not saying much

seduces/confuses what's the difference?

[Archetype]

He's the next Heath Ledger. lol
I already used that joke.

[smith42687]

I already used that joke.

Forgive me for not double quoting. I find it pretty funny that every questionable casting decision from this point forward will be the next Heath Ledger.

[Genius]

No one had better die in this movie.

[heelsguy]

What he said. Also, I bloody loved Layer Cake, and really liked Stardust.


my God, you admit seeing Stardust? Please tell me there was the promise of extraordinarily hot anal sex with the missus as your motivation?

[The Batman]

my God, you admit seeing Stardust? Please tell me there was the promise of extraordinarily hot anal sex with the missus as your motivation?

It didn't suck as much as you think it was going to. It was sort of a pleasant surprise, like finding a 5 in your pants that you haven't worn in months.

[Archetype]

my God, you admit seeing Stardust? Please tell me there was the promise of extraordinarily hot anal sex with the missus as your motivation?
Neil. Gaiman.

[Archangel]

my God, you admit seeing Stardust? Please tell me there was the promise of extraordinarily hot anal sex with the missus as your motivation?

As a matter of fact, I watched it because TMJ gave it a rather positive review, back on the old boards, and I wasn't disappointed.

What's your problem anyway?

[doubleocrow]

Marlon Wayans? I don't know if I can take that seriously.

[the creeps]

you always need comic relief. but i don't know if what he does counts as comedy.

[doubleocrow]

Do you think at the end of the movie they'll have one of those, "Now you know, and knowing is half the battle!" spots?

[highone]

Well based on the preview there look to be at least 28 seconds of awesomeness in the movie and I'm definitely interested in seeing more. The Snake Eyes stuff looked pretty rad in general.

[the creeps]

Do you think at the end of the movie they'll have one of those, "Now you know, and knowing is half the battle!" spots?

dvd extra. and they will make marlon do that shit.

[Cal]

I had small hopes for this movie, now I have hope for this movie that it will be an awesome action movie with a crap story. Just awesome action scenes right after each other.

[vasili denisov]

Marlon Wayans? I don't know if I can take that seriously.
This is a movie about a group of ninjas headed by two guys who wear metal masks who fight an elite team that includes an old timey sailor with a parrot, some guy who wears a diving suit everywhere, and a former supermodel / tank commander. If you took any of this seriously, you'd get your prescription doubled.

[vasili denisov]

L1BDM1oBRJ8

Ww3GTNv9hHk

[420monk]

480p Trailer
http://rapidshare.com/files/193156984/GoLeech.org_presents_gijoeriseofcobra-sbspot_h480p.hdmov

[Titus_Pullo]

New Trailer

http://www.myspace.com/trailerpark

[Bastard]

The real questions are whether their guns will shoot bullets or lasers and exactly how much cleavage will Lady Jaye and the Baroness be showing.

[Nataku187]

GI JOE Resolute which is the new animated series is very anime-esque, Snake-Eyes kills Stormshadow. I'm sure this movie isn't going to be the old 80's cartoon. I don't have high hopes for this film, but thinking its gonna be some corny kiddie movie I think is just moronic. Its gonna be Fast and Furious with a special ops twist, I'll watch it for a dollar.

BBQ sandwiches?

[Night Hawk]

wow.. just watched that trailer.. gonna go on a limb and say... crapfest.

[Will-Kill]

The Crysis suits are sooooooo cool...it makes em look like superheros.

[bootska]

Crappy crapfest.

[Claydon]

so.... i saw a preview for this...

once again i feel like my childhood is being raped, just like they did with transformers.

[Face]

your childhood sucked anyway

[logan103]

Is it just me or does this movie and the CGI/Fx look like a video game, somethin on Xbox/PS2...With a better director this movie could be moderately good, but no, we get the director of Van Helsing! Really?!

[Rumpleforeskin]

At no point did I expect anything other than complete shittiness, but I can't really wrap my head around why they decided to include the robot super suits.

[highone]

It's sad to think about the kind of movie GI Joe COULD have been with the right production/direction. I will gladly eat my words if the upcoming film is anything other than horrible with cheesy special effects (i.e. like the preview).

[Okie Medicvet]

Okay, not sure about this one, will prolly just hold out for when they do a movie of the comic book "Sgt. Fury and his Howling Commandoes".

[Philips25]

http://img250.imagevenue.com/loc88/th_94208_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still_12_122_88l o.jpg (http://img250.imagevenue.com/img.php?image=94208_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still _12_122_88lo.jpg) http://img215.imagevenue.com/loc230/th_94210_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still_13_122_230 lo.jpg (http://img215.imagevenue.com/img.php?image=94210_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still _13_122_230lo.jpg) http://img19.imagevenue.com/loc207/th_94211_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still_14_122_207 lo.jpg (http://img19.imagevenue.com/img.php?image=94211_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still _14_122_207lo.jpg) http://img250.imagevenue.com/loc558/th_94217_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still_16_122_558 lo.jpg (http://img250.imagevenue.com/img.php?image=94217_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still _16_122_558lo.jpg) http://img150.imagevenue.com/loc824/th_94218_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still_15_122_824 lo.jpg (http://img150.imagevenue.com/img.php?image=94218_G.I._Joe_Rise_of_Cobra_a_still _15_122_824lo.jpg)

[Face]

this movie is gonna be fucking terrible

[vasili denisov]

So, there was a rumor a while back that Sommers had been fired from the movie.


Was director Stephen Sommers “locked out of the editing room” on “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra?”

An online rumor that emerged on Thursday, which stated that Sommers, who has helmed such films as “The Mummy” and “Van Helsing,” was fired from the summer movie and replaced by edited Stuart Baird after the film tested poorly with audiences.
However, in an interview with film Web site Latino Review posted on Thursday afternoon, “G.I. Joe” producer Lorenzo di Bonaventura shot down the rumors.


http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31276243/


My source says Sommers "was given total freedom but he melted down and has made the biggest bomb in many a moon. Paramount production chief Brad Weston is looking to bail and work for Peter Chernin with Star Trek as his coda because G.I. Joe will decimate the Paramount team and lead to many, many scapegoats."
Here (http://www.donmurphy.net/board/showthread.php?t=31038)'s the "End Times" account with comments:

"After a test screening [of G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra] in which the film got the lowest test score ever from an audience in the history of Paramount, the executive who pushed for the movie -- Brad Weston -- had Stephen Sommers, the superhack director of the film, fired. Removed. Locked out of the editing room."


http://hollywood-elsewhere.com/2009/06/debacle_of_gi_j.php

I guess my question is: if the rumors are untrue, why is it the only person coming out to deny them is the producer? Usually directors are comrades in arms, and Stuart Baird would be expected to make a statement through his publicist denying his involvement in the movie. For some reason though, only Bonaventura has tried to dispell the rumors.

[Gary_Busey]

From the very first time I saw the trailer to this movie, I knew it would blow. I'm not at all excited about this shit and I fully expect it to tank at the box office. Sucks because the source material is so great, they could've done something really special with this shit.



Maybe I'm completely wrong and the movie comes out great, but I doubt it.

[Ethix]

They should've just made a Snake-Eyes origin movie.

[Claydon]

Everything I have read about it suggests a movie in trouble.

Production staff has been shaken more times than you can imagine, directors have been changed, post production groups have been hired and fired multiple times.

it is going to be a piece of shit

[ADD]

New York Times says a Must Miss

[Face]

as soon as I saw those stupid robot suits, I smelled bad things on the horizon

[shimian]

I predict it will do well in the first weekend if only because of the name value. But of course once everyone knows it sucks, it'll die off.

[ADD]

I don't think this one has the mass appeal with little kids like a Transformers does

[shimian]

Yeah it was probably the kids watching Transformers that made the box office numbers so high, but GI Joe is such a big name and has enough famous actors that people will go watch it.

[ADD]

And months of bad press is going to crush it

Unless, you get a lot of people like me who will go for free just to see how bad it really can be

[Philips25]

Unless, you get a lot of people like me who will go for free just to see how bad it really can be

Thats really the only chance it has to make any kind of money whatsoever...

[shimian]

How to you get to go see it for free?

[Hodge]

This will be the Street Fighter/Super Mario Brothers movie of this generation.

[shimian]

I would watch the Super Mario movie again, just for a few laughs. But Street Fighter doesnt appeal to me at all.

[HAWK]

They should just do a Snake Eyes movie and be done with it.

[Ethix]

They should've just made a Snake-Eyes origin movie.

They should just do a Snake Eyes movie and be done with it.


This.

[Will-Kill]

Getting the feeling the Trailers give you the tasty parts while the rest is the bland and worthless?

Futureistic tanks and planes would of been cool....the suits....why?

[shimian]

A problem with comic book movies is that they want to cram as much into them as possible. Too many characters and as much of the cool stuff from the comics as they can find an excuse to show.

[highone]

I hear what you're saying. Not that this is a fair comparison per say but take the newest Batman movies. Christopher Nolan didn't feel the need to involve a million cool gadgets, Bat-vehicles, or supervillains and the movies benefited from that approach.

[shimian]

I have been told (and kind of agree) that in the Dark Knight, they shouldnt have put Two Face into it. It was a bit much for one movie.

[ADD]

It's like adding Venom (and yes, I know he was crappy) toward the end of Spider-Man 3. What's the fucking point? All you do is make the movie 20-45 mins too long and use up what could be a great villain for another film.

[fadetoblack1985]

the preview i saw in theatres looks pretty awesome. its hard to say from that tho, many movies look amazing from the previews then end up being very disappointing.

[Captain Insano]

I will go not expecting much and hopefully be suprised. It has a way overdone feel to it though.

[fadetoblack1985]

makes sense, the whole "rise of cobra" part makes me think that they are actually going to plan on making more of them too, so hopefully this one is good

[ADD]

the preview i saw in theatres looks pretty awesome. its hard to say from that tho, many movies look amazing from the previews then end up being very disappointing.

makes sense, the whole "rise of cobra" part makes me think that they are actually going to plan on making more of them too, so hopefully this one is good

You're quite the optimist.

If this movie tanks, there might be no rise of anything.

Looking at the cast, you can't expect much

[fadetoblack1985]

rofl, i'm just like everyone else and hope its actually good. But we shall see, maybe it will tank. Just the name of the movie would suggest that its opening night numbers will be good but after that who knows

[Archangel]

its hard to say from that tho, many movies look amazing from the previews then end up being very disappointing.

In other news, water is wet.

[Draven X 23]

The only thing about this flick I want to see is Snake Eyes vs Storm Shadow.

The weird super suits have ruined the rest of the movie. I don't remember them from my childhood.

[ADD]

rofl, i'm just like everyone else and hope its actually good. But we shall see, maybe it will tank. Just the name of the movie would suggest that its opening night numbers will be good but after that who knows

I'm hoping it's the biggest train wreck in movie history and maybe, just maybe Hollywood will stop making this kind of shit. Also, it'll maybe end up being the best comedy of 2009 unintentionally.

I know, now I'm being the optimist.

Of course opening weekend will do well. But no one gauges anything on the first weekend except the studios. How much have shit like Dance Flick opened with? The real money is in how it does after that and then on home video

[Superhuman]

This movie looks so unbelievably bad that I have to see it. Good movie to see with some buddies on a Friday night after we get some booze in us.

[Philips25]

This film with be Riseable.... aaah haaa

[VG1506]

This movie looks so unbelievably bad that I have to see it. Good movie to see with some buddies on a Friday night after we get some booze in us.

lol... my buddies and I did the same thing for Battlefield Earth. I have to say it wasn't bad with a few beers in us.

[zaksisi]

First! Saw it with very low expectations was actually really surprised, that is how you make an action movie. G.I. Joe > Transformers 2

[billysocal]

Agree. Low expectations. Took the 12 year son. Reminded me of Transformers. Some great gadgets/weapons/vehicle toys. Some of the FX could have been better. [Not a spoiler]: When the plane is flying over the desert after the first action scene, I swear I thought I was watching Luke drive the Land Speeder. That bad. And bad green screen on the elevator ride down.

Other than that, and I'm not a purist about if characters strayed from their 25-year old storylines, I'd actually see it at the theaters a second time.

[Patman]

When they were spinning around in those suits I half-expected them to transform. The acting could've been better, the same for some of the CG, but really, not the nightmare I thought it would be.
3/5

[Philips25]

Holy fuck that film was terrible... truelly, utterly and completely shit.

Worst film of the year so far...

[Captain Insano]

I went with some of my buddies, 2 of them liked it, the others (4) agreed it was a horrid. Those two friends are now outside the circle of trust.

[Bill]

Really? I kinda dug it, I didn't go in expecting it to be amazing. It was a good mindless action flick.

My only complaint, not enough Scarlett. I love me some nerdy redheads.

[arod2105]

The movie was pretty good. I liked it alot, and I think that if a sequal is made, they will raise the bar. I would have to agree there was just not enough scarlett.

[vettex2]

it was ok

[watsmubic]

I'd watch Sienna Miller read the phone book if she had that cat-suit on.

[yogih27]

Great action movie, that's all