Emo Thread

[Pax Britannia]

Dont get too excited. I heard he doesnt tip.

[Hodge]

DON'T get a Physics degree!!!!!

[Face]

DON'T get a Physics degree!!!!!
I would never do such a thing

[hatepoppy]

DON'T get a Physics degree!!!!!
i changed my major from physics to civil engineering after freshman year.

score!

[WET HOT MESS]

I've considered that
Sammy, I love you and everything, but like I said before, you really need to be careful with how you spend your money and go to school and find something you love and are passionate about. Leave driving buses to the illegal immigrants.

[cleetus]

so I'm in a bad mood...how does one become emo?

Is there a course to take? a secret handshake?

[Alcestis]

so I'm in a bad mood...how does one become emo?

Is there a course to take? a secret handshake?


When a razor-blade gets involved.

[Face]

Sammy, I love you and everything, but like I said before, you really need to be careful with how you spend your money and go to school and find something you love and are passionate about. Leave driving buses to the illegal immigrants.
there are no illegal immigrants in victoria

[Claydon]

there are no illegal immigrants in victoria

bullllllllllshit

[Face]

bullllllllllshit
dem damn dirty messicans can't swim and they's scurred of boats, so we're safe here on the island

[Claydon]

dem damn dirty messicans can't swim and they's scurred of boats, so we're safe here on the island

cept for those pesky chinamen

[Face]

this isn't vancouver, the only thing we got here is old people

[WET HOT MESS]

That's probably why. You're making old people money. And old people are stingy.

[Gary_Busey]

So, I injured my peen on monday and I re-injured it this morning and now it fucking hurts. And I have to not touch it so I can fuck tomm night. This is going to be difficult.

[hatepoppy]

dem damn dirty messicans can't swim and they's scurred of boats, so we're safe here on the island
bullshit.

they dont build bridges to get over the rio grande.

[WET HOT MESS]

Broken banjo string?

[Alcestis]

So, I injured my peen on monday and I re-injured it this morning and now it fucking hurts. And I have to not touch it so I can fuck tomm night. This is going to be difficult.

Tight Levis + zipper malfunction = oops

[hatepoppy]

So, I injured my peen on monday and I re-injured it this morning and now it fucking hurts. And I have to not touch it so I can fuck tom tonight. This is going to be difficult.
who's tom?

[Face]

bullshit.

they dont build bridges to get over the rio grande.
that shit is shallow, they can wade across

[Gary_Busey]

Broken banjo string?
I don't play the banjo but yes.

[Poop Sailboat]

<------- actually has a banjo

[Gary_Busey]

<------- actually has a banjo
My old roomate had one....wait....are you my old roomate?!?!

[Poop Sailboat]

My old roomate had one....wait....are you my old roomate?!?!
is your old roomate extremely awesome?!?!?















































if so he isn't me

[Poop Sailboat]

but my old roomate had it, it broke, and he never came to get it, so maybe we have the same former roomate.

[Will-Kill]

Thats why its better to be Goth

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v703/GPonce/Goth.jpg

[AJ]

A friend of mine that I grew up with back home just died by electrocution. His brother died in a car accident about 7 years earlier. I don't know how his mom is going to make it through this one. She was suicidal after the first time. What a shit day.

I can't say that I'm real high on funerals, but it sucks living 1100 miles away and not being able to see your friend for the last time.

[mongo]

wait, wait, wait. i'm calling bs. we all know you don't have friends irl.

[AJ]

Fuck you ******.

[Menace2Sobriety]

I rushed for 170 in campus legend and my 360 froze. Just when I was gonna get on Heisman watch as well.

And Sky has decided to broadcast the big 12 championship rather than the SEC. I was having such a good Sunday.....

[Menace2Sobriety]

I'm in pain here.

[nuclearjew]

Why can't you get both championships?

[Menace2Sobriety]

Delayed coverage of European 'football' takes priority. I shouldn't really complain, this is the first year they've actually started showing a game of the week...... but Tebow is such a beast.......and I hate Saban so much.

[nuclearjew]

You're missing a hell of a game. This one might be going to OT.

[Menace2Sobriety]

Bastards capped my broadband as well so I cant even get a stream.

[NOTKyle]

Why do people even live in New Zealand?

Do you guys have microwave ovens yet?

[Blue]

If that was a joke it wasn't funny.

[NOTKyle]

It was a pretty serious question actually.

[Kerjack]

I just noticed I'm missing a card I received a few years back that I actually wanted to keep, had a cute little drawing of Link in it. That makes me sad, it has always been in this drawer and now its not. :( :(

[mongo]

i stole it!

[Face]

wah

[BIG PIZZLE]

After I read a card, I immediately throw it in the garbage.

[Kerjack]

After I read a card, I immediately throw it in the garbage.

I think this is the only card I've ever tried to keep in my life. Its a shame.

[Jericho]

I'll draw Link.

Linkovich Chomofsky!

[Limp]

The day before Christmas Eve we found out our 3rd biggest client is filling for Bankruptcy Protection... and it doesn't look good.

Writing off millions of dollars owed to us could have an affect on out bottom line... and my bonus.

Looks like I'm out $15,000 this July...

Ohh and because my only boss is a VP... he isn't on vacation in Hawaii until January 14th anymore.... he is here... calling me... and signing me up for meetings about this shit.

Fuck Mondays. All of them.

[Claydon]

The day before Christmas Eve we found out our 3rd biggest client is filling for Bankruptcy Protection... and it doesn't look good.

Writing off millions of dollars owed to us could have an affect on out bottom line... and my bonus.

Looks like I'm out $15,000 this July...

Ohh and because my only boss is a VP... he isn't on vacation in Hawaii until January 14th anymore.... he is here... calling me... and signing me up for meetings about this shit.

Fuck Mondays. All of them.

make sure to post a pic of your food stamps card so that we may all lol.

[Limp]

make sure to post a pic of your food stamps card so that we may all lol.
I'm still going to clear 6 figures... even without my bonus...

[Summer]

stfu and detail my car, boy.

[mongo]

I'm still going to clear 6 figures... even without my bonus...

you're not supposed to count the two zeros after the decimal point.

[Limp]

u sow funnah

[Gary_Busey]

I watched my two year old nephew fall down the stairs this weekend. Freaked me the fuck out.

[IdiotBrain]

Don't worry. They bounce at that age.

[Gary_Busey]

Nope, he just thudded down about 10 stairs. Got a cut under his eye. He won't be going near the basement door again.

[The GWD]

My throat is raw as a motherfucker, my head is pounding like a bitch, and my dad just called me to tell me my great grandmother died.

I mean, I didn't talk to her all that often, but the last time I did she told me she only needs to live long enough to see me get married.

Also, I can't eat.

[janois]

My throat is raw as a motherfucker, my head is pounding like a bitch, and my dad just called me to tell me my great grandmother died.

I mean, I didn't talk to her all that often, but the last time I did she told me she only needs to live long enough to see me get married.

Also, I can't eat.
I'm gonna assume you're not married.

[The GWD]

Engaged. Tentative wedding scheduled for August 29th. She was very excited. Now very dead.

[mongo]

i fully expect a wedding announcement in the local tri cities paper. i'll be looking for it!

[janois]

Engaged. Tentative wedding scheduled for August 29th. She was very excited. Now very dead.
My grandma died a few months before my wedding as well. She was buried in the outfit she bought for it. It was a little creepy for me.

[Okie Medicvet]

My mom called saying her kid brother died..my Uncle Johnny. He had pneumonia. This is doubtless pretty hard on her because she just lost Dad this past summer. I really don't know what to fucking say or do, and feel bad as shit because all I did was talk to mom on the phone today instead of going to see her in person. I will go to church with her tomorrow, but I know I should have seen her today.

[NOTKyle]

Like death is anything to be emo about.

I just had to drive really far in the snow. Try that on for size.

[The GWD]

There was a shitload of snow here.

Plus I'm too sick to jerk off. I mean, it's all I have.

[NOTKyle]

I'M TOO TIRED TO JERK OFF

We're like sad twins.

[Face]

There was a shitload of snow here.

Plus I'm too sick to jerk off. I mean, it's all I have.
I'll happily jerk you off if you'd like

[Okie Medicvet]

You are right..I ain't nearly emo enough. Being too tired to fap does outdo it for sure.

[Face]

ew... just, ew...

*vomits*

[Jericho]

ew... just, ew...

*vomits*
Okies been fucking awful tonight

[Face]

okie is revolting on virtually every level

[mongo]

unless she's posting her babies tits, she's usually awful.

[Will-Kill]

I have been working everyday since Jan 2, I'm going to get Sat off....no matter what.

[Face]

I have been working everyday since Jan 2, I'm going to get Sat off....no matter what.
you have not lived until you've worked 16 days in a row

[Jericho]

Note to Self: I don't want to live

[Okie Medicvet]

okie is revolting on virtually every level

Flattery will get you nowhere.

[NOTKyle]

I took my car in to my neighbors dealership to get my alignment checked out (my car pulls to the right) and because something is leaking onto the snow. So far the "head gasket" is leaking ($600) and he hasn't even looked at the alignment problem. I may need to troll craigslist for a new whip.

[Kerjack]

I took my car in to my neighbors dealership to get my alignment checked out (my car pulls to the right) and because something is leaking onto the snow. So far the "head gasket" is leaking ($600) and he hasn't even looked at the alignment problem. I may need to troll craigslist for a new whip.

Its not leaking letting the antifreeze into the oil is it? Does your oil look milky white?

[NOTKyle]

I have no idea man. The dude's got my car.

I'm guessing that's bad?

[Kerjack]

Can be terminal, as in your engine is fucked. But my guess is he would have told you had that been the case.

[Kerjack]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Head_gasket

[NOTKyle]

Yeah I don't think that's the case. I know next to nothing about cars, except how to drive them poorly, but like I said the head gasket is leaking. Apparently for $600 I'm getting a deal though.

I DUNNO

[NOTKyle]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Head_gasket

Sounds important. And I can see why it'd be a pain in the ass job, sounds like it'd be difficult to get to and replace.

[Datači]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1121262/Feeling-blue-Today--January-19-2009--depressing-day-HISTORY-say-experts.html
But seriously, today was a really fucked up day for me :(

[The GWD]

Who died?

[Datači]

Actually, a friend's grandmother. I visited her place today, but that's not what got me down.

[TylerDurden]

osumike is fat and feels sorry for himself.

discuss.

[WET HOT MESS]

It was right under your nose.

[Claydon]

$600 for a head gasket is cheap

[misterfatt]

after the hoopla this weekend here, my liver hates me, is sad, and possibly suicidal.

[TylerDurden]

$600 for a head gasket is cheap

depends on the car, and depends on whether you do it yourself.

[NOTKyle]

depends on the car, and depends on whether you do it yourself.

Mid 90s buick, and I didn't.

My neighbor's a sweetheart.

[WET HOT MESS]

There's something surreal about a loved one withering away. I don't think myself superstitious though I cannot stop myself from wondering if it's a bad omen with yesterday marking a new lunar year. To top it off, I don't feel lousy, miserable or upset in the least. I think I still might be in shock. I might want a drink.

I also managed to puke a bit earlier today.

[Jericho]

There's something surreal about a loved one withering away. I don't think myself superstitious though I cannot stop myself from wondering if it's a bad omen with yesterday marking a new lunar year. To top it off, I don't feel lousy, miserable or upset in the least. I think I still might be in shock. I might want a drink.

I also managed to puke a bit earlier today.
Aw, go vote on my comedy poll. The memories may bring you smiles

[WET HOT MESS]

If that doesn't work, I could always curl up into a pathetic little ball and read myself to sleep.

[Jericho]

That, too

[Pax Britannia]

There's something surreal about a loved one withering away. I don't think myself superstitious though I cannot stop myself from wondering if it's a bad omen with yesterday marking a new lunar year. To top it off, I don't feel lousy, miserable or upset in the least. I think I still might be in shock. I might want a drink.

I also managed to puke a bit earlier today.

My Grandfather has Alzheimers and over the past 2 years he has essentially been taken from us piece by piece. Even though his body is still alive his brain is essentially dead.

It's an odd feeling. Even though your sad that the person you knew and loved for years is gone their still walking around. It's like you dont feel the loss.

[mongo]

real men drink to get rid of the pain.

[Pax Britannia]

Umm ok.

[WET HOT MESS]

Hope is a dirty bitch. My uncle was starting to get better after months in the hospital, and then this happens. Docs said his brain is slowly turning into mush and then he won't have more than a few days after that. Hmm, at least he's had a good life.

[WET HOT MESS]

real men drink to get rid of the pain.What am I supposed to do, IV him a some alcohol?

[6655321]

would it be better to die younger and remember all the significant portions of your life or rot away and forget completely about the life you had?

i'd rather go out younger and still know who i was.

[Pax Britannia]

would it be better to die younger and remember all the significant portions of your life or rot away and forget completely about the life you had?

i'd rather go out younger and still know who i was.

One things for sure. I'm not ending up like my grandfather.

[6655321]

my grandpa died outta nowhere from prostate cancer.

[BIG PIZZLE]

That's not outta nowhere, he died outta his butt.

[Kerjack]

I know you all will rip me apart for saying it, but damn it. I ruined a good thing in my life and I feel like shit for it and will for a long fucking time. I just wanted to say that somewhere. That I suck.

[dick_darlington]

I know you all will rip me apart for saying it, but damn it. I ruined a good thing in my life and I feel like shit for it and will for a long fucking time. I just wanted to say that somewhere. That I suck.
please tell me you aren't dwelling on the chick from california again..

[Kerjack]

Aye unfortunately. I should not be so hard on myself really, it wasn't just me that screwed up. Its just the end result blows.

and oh yeah, fuck you

[Jericho]

'mere,lil buddy

[Kerjack]

*bro'hug*

[Face]

more like Kerjoke

[jemeske]

Twenty-nine minutes for that, huh?

[Face]

I just got here, sue me

...

actually I thought of that a couple days ago and I've been waiting to use it

[Kerjack]

Honestly that is about ten times better then half the retarded play on words people around here have come up with for it.

Still is bad though, I can't believe none of you have used KerJACKASS.

[Face]

because it's stupid and obvious?

[Face]

also I'm pretty sure someone has used it anyway

[jemeske]

What about KERnel McPussybuttholestein?

[NOTKyle]

Kerjack you really need to post pictures of this girl. If you've messed it up that bad it shouldn't matter to ya.

I NEED BOOBIE PIX

[Kerjack]

Uh, it was never like that. It was more a long friendship (about four years I think) with me having found myself attracted to her at a few points.

[jemeske]

I guess you could just describe her boobs to us then. What you think they would look like, that is.

[NOTKyle]

Stevie Wonders?

[hatepoppy]

What about KERnel McPussybuttholestein?
*McPussybuttjoelstein

[Gary_Busey]

Kerjack has a summer home in The Friend Zone.

[NOTKyle]

But the view is fantastic!

[Kopek]

Two things:

1. She was probably the love of your life.

2. Right now she's most likely in the middle of a Gus Van Sant shot-for-shot remake of the Anne Hathaway does the Mexican mafia scene in 'Havoc'. Doesn't that make your loins tingle?

[mongo]

if you were not a big pussy and actually fucked that shit, she might have stuck around. virgin = fail

[IdiotBrain]

wait wait wait. kerjack is a virgin?

Holy wtfail dude. Go buy some poon or something.

[6655321]

wait wait wait. kerjack is a virgin?

Holy wtfail dude. Go buy some poon or something.

he's saving himself for a nice girl such as yourself.

[Archangel]

Honestly that is about ten times better then half the retarded play on words people around here have come up with for it.

Montana: Come for the nightlife, stay for the eloquence.

[Face]

*sigh*

[Archangel]

*uncaring*

[Pax Britannia]

*sigh*

Eat less, do some excercise.

Go to night school.

Get a real job.

Get a woman.

Gloat on GMF.

[NOTKyle]

Then he'll be in here complaining that he has no time to build models.

It's give and take Pax. Give and take.

[medlar]

In the near three years I have lived here in Canada with relatives, it's been almost two years of having some inner peace. I've achieved alot and have surprised even myself at what I can do if I put my mind to it. Continuing my education here, and the stipulation is that I finish school, I'm in my last year anyway, I have earned myself three honours and $900 ftw. I'm flying through this year.

I've done some growing up, mentally that is, and I can make choices based on what I want to do without the consent of adults, which is likely to see what I can make of myself for another possible three years in Canada. I've got drive to work, excell in soccer but Honours aren't goiing to mean much if I go back to home to Belfast. That said and done, I have cut all contact off with my mum after I laboured through a six page hand written letter to her. I got back her threats well my uncle took the call as he normally will from her.. of suicide, on account of my ungratefulness to herself for raising me and how difficult she had it in coping with me. See, she has completely lost herself.My grandparents have aged twice fold on account of her and it is the one thing that will likely be on my back for years to come, I can't go emo on this, it could be my excuse to give up and blame it all on my upbringing. It's not really an emo rant at all this. Except I miss the hell out being in Belfast alot of the times.

Offside.The girl I'm trying to ask out is just not interested in me and I'm settling for the bottom of the barrel.

[The GWD]

So my fiancee took me today to what I thought was supposed to be a marriage counseling fucking class to get this pastor dude to marry us, instead it was just some boring ass fucking seminar about Lutheran beliefs that lasted from 8AM to almost 4:30PM. A fucking church class.

I'm not even religious. That was BULLSHIT. What a great fucking way to spend my fucking Saturday.

[janois]

So my fiancee took me today to what I thought was supposed to be a marriage counseling fucking class to get this pastor dude to marry us, instead it was just some boring ass fucking seminar about Lutheran beliefs that lasted from 8AM to almost 4:30PM. A fucking church class.

I'm not even religious. That was BULLSHIT. What a great fucking way to spend my fucking Saturday.
At least she's not Catholic.

[Face]

punch her in her smelly uterus

[The GWD]

I yelled at her enough to make her cry uncontrollably. And our parents and us are going to meet up for dinner in half an hour. Fucking wonderful.

[Will-Kill]

So my fiancee took me today to what I thought was supposed to be a marriage counseling fucking class to get this pastor dude to marry us, instead it was just some boring ass fucking seminar about Lutheran beliefs that lasted from 8AM to almost 4:30PM. A fucking church class.

I'm not even religious. That was BULLSHIT. What a great fucking way to spend my fucking Saturday.

I'm guessing its about being good, respectful and nice to one another?

[janois]

If she doesn't have a black eye, you don't love her enough.

[The GWD]

To Will-Kill. I think so. I was spacing out the whole time. Like in fucking school.

[}{arlequin]

I yelled at her enough to make her cry uncontrollably. And our parents and us are going to meet up for dinner in half an hour. Fucking wonderful.
ahhh, marriage....

[Will-Kill]

Women love and respect men when they don't listen/care/love/respect things that are important to them...you are so getting your dick wet tonight.

If she doesn't have a black eye, you don't love her enough.

Those are called "Love Marks"

I yelled at her enough to make her cry uncontrollably. And our parents and us are going to meet up for dinner in half an hour. Fucking wonderful.

You, your Father and Father-in-law can bond and share stories on how terrible marriage is in the home while putting a strong front around others.

[janois]

Has anyone else watched Batman: The Brave and the Bold?
Not so good. The kids like it cause it's Batman, but me... not so much.

Edit: Wrong thread dickweed!

[Will-Kill]

Seen a few...I compare it to the new Transformer cartoons....very Cartoony and corny. It has a fair amount of "acton" with bits of humor.

Overall it just sucks.

[Claydon]

So my fiancee took me today to what I thought was supposed to be a marriage counseling fucking class to get this pastor dude to marry us, instead it was just some boring ass fucking seminar about Lutheran beliefs that lasted from 8AM to almost 4:30PM. A fucking church class.

I'm not even religious. That was BULLSHIT. What a great fucking way to spend my fucking Saturday.



My wife tried to get me to do that shit. I flat out refused to attend.

[mongo]

good reason to bump the thread there, fucknutz.

[redsox39]

Got busted by the wife doing a line of blow with her sister and brother...

i don't want to go home...

[Claydon]

Got busted by the wife doing a line of blow with her sister and brother...

i don't want to go home...

bahahaha!

[redsox39]

bahahaha!

Ah, Fuck you man! lol

[The Dude]

Got busted by the wife doing a line of blow with her sister and brother...

i don't want to go home...

i know that feeling

[Morfin]

Did you do the coke before or after you created all the new threads?

[Claydon]

Starting about two days ago I came down with acute bilateral elbow pain that would radiate into my wrists, and shoulders, and associated with burning and at times numbness.

I gave it a couple of days and mega dosed some ibuprofen but to little effect. Paid a visit to the doctor today and he is concerned about a collapsing disc in the cervical spine. For now, no work, strict rest, trammadol, muscle relaxant, and celebrex. If not better in 7 days I get an MRI. I am feeling rather depressed about this.

[Jericho]

Like a herniated disc? Hopefully it ain't your C4 man, or you'll be in ruthless pain.

[The Dude]

http://www.forumspile.com/Thread-I_like_where_this_thread_is_going.jpg

[Rover]

Go to Canada. An MRI will free up in 2 months or 15 depending on the province. That would triple your emo.

[Claydon]

Like a herniated disc? Hopefully it ain't your C4 man, or you'll be in ruthless pain.

Probably not, more like a disc that is degenerating, hence the branches of nerves that originate in the lower cervical spine and into the arms is basically pissed off.

[Claydon]

Go to Canada. An MRI will free up in 2 months or 15 depending on the province. That would triple your emo.

yah no kidding.

I already called an imaging center nearby, they can see me today if I want to come in. I am however going to wait and pursue the conservative therapy.

[NOTKyle]

A kid pledging some frat that my girlfriend was good friends with at one point died of alcohol poisoning last night.

The o/u on the frat's existence is set at 2.5 weeks.

[hatepoppy]

ouch. that shit couldve happened to any of us. wouldve to me im sure if i wasnt such a hoss.

[hatepoppy]

my gf's brother's exgf's husband died last nite. they just had a kid like 4 months ago.

[}{arlequin]

going to school just to die of drinking retardation? fail.

[hatepoppy]

going to school just to die of drinking retardation? fail.
you never had too much to drink?

[Face]

only the strong survive

[hatepoppy]

only the strong survive
OTSS!

[Jericho]

4 LYFE!

[}{arlequin]

you never had too much to drink?
weekly as opposed to weakly

[hatepoppy]

weekly as opposed to weakly
like a FOX!

[NOTKyle]

going to school just to die of drinking retardation? fail.

I guarantee what happened was that he passed out at the frat house, and just died in the middle of the night because the idiots in charge of making sure kids don't die were busy fucking ugly freshman girls. I'm hoping his parents have the balls to sue the kid that owns the house.

[Bill Paxton]

So i'd been hooking up with this girl for the last 3 weeks (girl C for anyone that read the relationship advice thread). All of a sudden, this friday, she invites me to her room for what I think is the normal drunken hookup and then she starts going off about how we can't drunken hook up anymore because she doesn't feel right about it, and shes my best friend's roommate, and she wants more out of this, and all this crazy shit.

So I ended up laying there next to a chick in her underwear with a huge boner all night long, because she said that i could definately still sleep in her bed.

[NOTKyle]

Then either propose or gtfo.

Why the hell would you sleep there?

[Angry Ass Messican Dude]

So i'd been hooking up with this girl for the last 3 weeks (girl C for anyone that read the relationship advice thread). All of a sudden, this friday, she invites me to her room for what I think is the normal drunken hookup and then she starts going off about how we can't drunken hook up anymore because she doesn't feel right about it, and shes my best friend's roommate, and she wants more out of this, and all this crazy shit.

So I ended up laying there next to a chick in her underwear with a huge boner all night long, because she said that i could definately still sleep in her bed.


You listened to me and went for a girl C?

I'm proud. Next step. Tell her to quite being a huge fucking pussy and put out.

[Bill Paxton]

You listened to me and went for a girl C?

I'm proud. Next step. Tell her to quite being a huge fucking pussy and put out.
Im not too worried about it, it works out ok since i was kind worried where this hooking up would lead and how i was gonna end it when girl A came back. Im just really annoyed.

[Tar Heel]

Tell her like this: Gurl, you must be on the rag to turn down this dick. Call me when your poon stops bleeding and that brain of yours starts recognizing logic over your shitty emotions. Then spit on her roomate and leave.

[Claydon]

why the fuck do women get so goddamned emo.

just drink and make out and have fun...christ. they read way too much sweet valley high as school girls, that or they are too into this original sin bullshit.

[Bill Paxton]

Preaching to the choir. I was pretty much just like "we had a good time didn't we? Are you like looking for a relationship or something?" And she just went on about how it was wrong and shit. I couldn't effing believe it. I think she wanted me to like ask her out on a real date or something because apparently she really likes me, but thats not gonna happen.

[NOTKyle]

Or maybe she actually doesn't like you at all and was sick of your smelly penis being inside of her.

[Bill Paxton]

Or maybe she actually doesn't like you at all and was sick of your smelly penis being inside of her.

My penis doesn't smell that bad anymore

EDIT: Actually, i bet my sperm tastes awful. I have a pretty high protein diet with minimal fruit/sugar, and if i understand correctly that makes for yucky sperms

[NOTKyle]

Only because you aren't having sex with her anymore.


See how I turned that around?

[hatepoppy]

My penis doesn't smell that bad anymore

EDIT: Actually, i bet my sperm tastes awful. I have a pretty high protein diet with minimal fruit/sugar, and if i understand correctly that makes for yucky sperms
"if you understand correctly"?

dont lie, faggot.

[Bill Paxton]

Only because you aren't having sex with her anymore.


See how I turned that around?

Her vag smelled normal

[Limp]

At work on a Sunday.

At least my crazy bitch of a wife isn't here!

I am emo and unemo at the very same time. The mixed feelings make me emo. Now I am emo, emo, and unemo.

[NOTKyle]

Why the hell did you get married?

[Trident]

Because she saved his life.

[Limp]

Some shit just makes sense at the time... ya know?

[Claydon]

how did she save your life?

[Limp]

1. Even I got a little creeped out by trident remembering that shit.

2. I was supposed to go out with some friends when my wife and I first met. She called me last minute and I ditched 3 of my friends to go get some poonani. Well the next morning my 3 friends were all dead. After they left a club they met up with a Camaro in their WS6 TransAm and raced. On the way back a drunk guy cut them off, and to avoid hitting him they swerved, tapped a curb and got throw into a concrete wall where the HOV lane meets the freeway. The car broke into two pieces and exploded. Even though they found the wallet of one of my friends 120 ft. from the wreck it took two weeks to identify the body.

Yeah she didn't do it on purpose but damn... it was almost the end of limpy!

That was a fun funeral... 10 days before x-mas for 3 of my closest friends.

Thank God this is the Emo thread... I miss those fuckers.

[Syndicate]

Apparently I got shitfaced last night and for some reason decided to drink an entire bottle of A-1 Sauce. I have no idea what drove me to do this, but my stomach is on fucking fire still because of it.

[Claydon]

Apparently I got shitfaced last night and for some reason decided to drink an entire bottle of A-1 Sauce. I have no idea what drove me to do this, but my stomach is on fucking fire still because of it.

good god.

you will be fucking crying like a baby when it comes time to hit the john.

ouch!

take some pepcid... should help calm things down.

[Syndicate]

Oh.. This isn't Off-Topic. Fuck it.

[Jericho]

Apparently I got shitfaced last night and for some reason decided to drink an entire bottle of A-1 Sauce. I have no idea what drove me to do this, but my stomach is on fucking fire still because of it.
haha. You idiot.

[Claydon]

1. Even I got a little creeped out by trident remembering that shit.

2. I was supposed to go out with some friends when my wife and I first met. She called me last minute and I ditched 3 of my friends to go get some poonani. Well the next morning my 3 friends were all dead. After they left a club they met up with a Camaro in their WS6 TransAm and raced. On the way back a drunk guy cut them off, and to avoid hitting him they swerved, tapped a curb and got throw into a concrete wall where the HOV lane meets the freeway. The car broke into two pieces and exploded. Even though they found the wallet of one of my friends 120 ft. from the wreck it took two weeks to identify the body.

Yeah she didn't do it on purpose but damn... it was almost the end of limpy!

That was a fun funeral... 10 days before x-mas for 3 of my closest friends.

Thank God this is the Emo thread... I miss those fuckers.


jesus christ limp!

That is an incredible story.... so yah, I guess she did save your life in a way. That and you wanted to get some which any male can understand.

wow!

[Trident]

1. Even I got a little creeped out by trident remembering that shit.



Thank God this is the Emo thread... I miss those fuckers.

1. I have a good memory.
2. Knowledge is power!
3. Losing friends rarely gets easier over time.

[Jericho]

Or maybe limp could've saved his friends by being an extra variable that they might have hit that road two minutes later

[Trident]

Apparently I got shitfaced last night and for some reason decided to drink an entire bottle of A-1 Sauce. I have no idea what drove me to do this, but my stomach is on fucking fire still because of it.

I drank no more than a 1/4 of a bottle of this (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dave%27s_Gourmet) stuff when drunk some years back.

In between bouts of vomiting, I went for a piss, touched my cock with traces of the sauce on my hands and suffered more pain than I ever thought I could have again. Then, I rubbed my eyes.

I was a pitiful wreck.

[Claydon]

I drank no more than a 1/4 of a bottle of this (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dave%27s_Gourmet) stuff when drunk some years back.

In between bouts of vomiting, I went for a piss, touched my cock with my traces of the sauce on my hands and suffered more pain than I ever thought I could have again. Then, I rubbed my eyes.

I was a pitiful wreck.

as a child (i think i was 9) my dog went after the mailman. I didn't know that the mailman carried CS cansiters (they don't anymore) and my dog came into the house squinting his eyes and really watering. So I rubbed his face with my hands, few moments later i rubbed my face and eyes.

Needless to say I was crying like a fucking baby for a couple hours.

[Limp]

Or maybe limp could've saved his friends by being an extra variable that they might have hit that road two minutes later
My therapist thanks you..... mother fucker.

[Jericho]

My therapist thanks you..... mother fucker.
The real question is, why did your wife kill your friends and how long til she punches your ticket?

[Limp]

OMFG! YOU'RE RIGHT!

*Loads gun*

She ain't gonna beat me to it!

[Trident]

With Limp being Texan, I kinda believe him.

[The GWD]

I was trying to play video games and make grilled cheese sandwiches at the same time and ended up burning the sandwiches beyond recognition as a sandwich.

Now I'm very sad.

[mongo]

Buttsex?

[Erased]

:( Mannnn this sucks! My best friend is getting shipped back off for Iraq tomorrow. :(

[Claydon]

:( Mannnn this sucks! My best friend is getting shipped back off for Iraq tomorrow. :(

So sorry to hear that, I have a friend leaving for afghanistan next month.

[Erased]

He has been there since like last Aug. but like he had a 2 week leave thing so he was able to come home and hang out and stuff and it just sucks that he has to go back.

[Claydon]

He has been there since like last Aug. but like he had a 2 week leave thing so he was able to come home and hang out and stuff and it just sucks that he has to go back.

where has he been, or can he say?

[PhilipChocolate]

wow! i was gonna come here and whine, but after reading your shit...My stuff seems trivial in comparison, thanks guys, your semi crappy lifes have cheered me up a bit.

[mongo]

i'm above having friends in the service. thus, i don't have these emo feelings. ever.

[PhilipChocolate]

lucky bastard

[Le Goat]

He has been there since like last Aug. but like he had a 2 week leave thing so he was able to come home and hang out and stuff and it just sucks that he has to go back.

my best bud did a tour in Iraq, came home for a year then got shipped off to fight with the Delta boys in Eastern Afghanistan. Your buddy is lucky to be in Iraq right now and not Afghanistan.

[6655321]

...i don't have these emo feelings. ever.

score one for bottling up your emotions! i see murderous rampage in your near future.

[Daydreamer]

i'm above having friends in the service. thus, i don't have these emo feelings. ever.

score one for bottling up your emotions! i see murderous rampage in your near future.


What's Mongo the vegetarian going to do? Go on a rampage in the produce department?

[Okie Medicvet]

So my mom is making me feel reallly guilty for not coming and visit her more often, since she does live in the same town and everything. It's like she's giving me a tour guide for a major guilt trip, especially since my Dad died last June and all.

But she is really into her church friends and shit, honest!

[mongo]

next time you go to her house, drive off the bridge.

[TylerDurden]

especially since my Dad died last June and all.

got any brothers or sisters? if yes, then the "burden" needs to be shared with your siblings. if not, then suck it up... unless you're a horrible fucking child.

after being married for so long your identity as an individual isn't so much pronounced as the identity as a couple. she lost more than a husband; she lost half of who she is. she needs to be reminded, and although friends are great to have they're not a metric for who you are. your kids and family are, literally, a living record of you. blood is thicker than water, as they say. put yourself in her shoes, and if that still doesn't work to sway you then remember who brought you into this world, provided, taught, and took care of you.

srsly, unless your parents were horrible people i find there to be no fucking excuse to ignore or neglect them when it doesn't suit the child. the growing disrespect for parents and elders in this country fucking disgusts me.

[mongo]

I will only hate my parents if they stop giving me money.

[Face]

so they were cool with you being gay and all?

[Okie Medicvet]

I am the oldest of five kids, and there is another one that lives less than an hour from her too. She just got back from visiting my sister and her family, and owns the home they live in, as well as the one she lives in, and the one my brother lives in. I don't want anything from her, but while I am willing to stop by and say I love her, I feel it should be my sister to handle most of the burden. After all, she will be getting the most moulah, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that either.

Only thing really in debate is will my mom be able to push my sister and her family her to OK, or will they be the ones to push her back to Ventura.

[mongo]

Okie, shut.the.fuck.up. You should be thrilled your mom wants you massive ass around, let alone bitch about not seeing it enough.

[Okie Medicvet]

okay, i have been guilted into going and seeing her tomorrow..going to church even..blah!

[Bizz]

Look at it this way Okie. Put the shoe on the other foot. Do you want your daughter (Future Mrs.Bizz) to resent you later in life? The woman is starting to realize her own mortality with the passing of your father. Spend some time with her and enjoy it while you can.

[mongo]

Her daughter will spend more time w/ jenny craig than either of you.

[Bizz]

Look dude, I don't appreciate you talking about my girl like that.

[mongo]

Sorry. I forgot about you cottage cheese fetish.

[The GWD]

Cottage cheese is wonderful.

[Jericho]

I concur

[Trident]

I am the oldest of five kids, and there is another one that lives less than an hour from her too. She just got back from visiting my sister and her family, and owns the home they live in, as well as the one she lives in, and the one my brother lives in. I don't want anything from her, but while I am willing to stop by and say I love her, I feel it should be my sister to handle most of the burden. After all, she will be getting the most moulah, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that either.

Only thing really in debate is will my mom be able to push my sister and her family her to OK, or will they be the ones to push her back to Ventura.

So you're saying that the amount of love and time you give her is proportional to the financial investment she's made in your living arrangements?

The fact you call it a 'burden' is worrying, although without knowing the family dynamics it's hard to make a call on this. Do the other children consider her a burden as well? Is she some ogre? Or just a lonely person who is not communicating her sadness very well after the loss of her husband. Make sure your kids visit her as well, they're the ones she'll want to see the most.

Family relationships are a pain, my Mum has an awkward relationship with her Mum - even though she is turning in to her!

[BeeRand]

Get her an animal of some sort. The less you drop by, the more she will humanize the animal and forget about the infinite, blackening sadness which is slowly consuming her soul. She can talk to it and turn on the TV when she grows grocery shopping (so it thinks there's humans around).

[Daydreamer]

When okie's kid moves out in the next couple of months and begins popping out little Bizzes then she'll start avoiding okie like this.

[Trident]

So one of my very good friend's Dad went in for a 'routine' heart bypass on Monday, he suffered fits when he was brought out of the anesthetic, and now he's been rushed back in to theatre with internal bleeding - this sucks, he's a great guy and someone I respect very much.

I feel pretty useless as they're 50 miles away and only close family are allowed in the hospital.

[Trident]

At this point Claydon would make some retarded and uneducated comment about the NHS somehow trying to kill its users.

I miss you big guy. No, not really.

[Pax Britannia]

Thats tough man I hope he pulls through.

[Will-Kill]

I Slipped on the wet floor, hurt my elbow hurts, my wrist is cut up but at least the pain is fading. Even though it happen over hour in a half/ two hours ago I was out of breath (wind knocked out of me) and dizzy for 15-20 mins....its been awhile since I felt so weak.

[Face]

dumbass

[Will-Kill]

Your hurtful remarks makes me more emo.

[hatepoppy]

i was thinking 'pussy' but whatever.

[Will-Kill]

Ill sooth the pain in my soul with poetry or tight jeans.

And listen to My Chemical Romance and Panic at the Disco.

[Okie Medicvet]

So you're saying that the amount of love and time you give her is proportional to the financial investment she's made in your living arrangements?

The fact you call it a 'burden' is worrying, although without knowing the family dynamics it's hard to make a call on this. Do the other children consider her a burden as well? Is she some ogre? Or just a lonely person who is not communicating her sadness very well after the loss of her husband. Make sure your kids visit her as well, they're the ones she'll want to see the most.

Family relationships are a pain, my Mum has an awkward relationship with her Mum - even though she is turning in to her!

She's only a burden in the sense that spending time with her makes me realize that she is a queen of all tour guides for guilt trips. I grew up with her telling me that everything I ever did reflected on her.

But yes I love her and she does have her good points. She is a christian in the best sense of the word...or was. When we were growing up, there was always not just us five kids, but anywhere between 1 and 4 more kids living in the house for indefinite periods of times. While there are times that her being so into church gets on my last nerve, but she is a good woman, if almost as emotionally unstable as me.

[medlar]

It has rained and dumped snow pretty much all of springbreak. Most of my friends have gone to Mexico, Hawaii, and Domincan Republic. It sucks. GMF gives me comfort that I'm obviously not the only one not enjoying sun and scantily clad chicks. I have gone snowboarding twice but I suck at it. Who learns it in Ireland anyway?

My boss called me stud. I'm not sure I want to blame that on a possible misuse of language. He's fresh from Poland or maybe it's time to not seek that raise.

He phoned me up with my schedule and added. See you on site, stud. Maybe he said Bud, and I just misheard. He's got a thick accent and all.

[Limp]

medlar will be in here posting about getting ass fucked by his boss the day he get's to the site.

[medlar]

Babelfish will translate this for me. I'm sure its polack for numberone worker.

[Limp]

More like his number one in your number two.

[Hoser]

Well this is the first time I have had anything to write about in here.

I just spent the last 4 hours editing a power point for a major presentation I have tomorrow. I had it perfect, I was so pumped. I saved for the final time (had been saving constantly) and closed it so I could email it out ot my group members. Well guess what happened.


IT IS FUCKING GONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so pissed off right now.

Well back to 4 more hours of editing.

[Face]

*giggle*

[Bizz]

Have you tried "Recent Documents"?

[Hoser]

Yeah I spent about 15 minutes looking for it.

The guy who made it sent it in a zip file, which I guess made it read only, so none of the saves actually saved.

[Bizz]

Have you tried not doing that?

[Archetype]

It's probably in a temp folder.

[Jericho]

aha, Yelram got you good,you fucker!

[Hoser]

It's probably in a temp folder.

No dice. It isn't anywhere.

I am going to kind of half ass this one. I wont remember everything I did and wont try to. This will be a bit more rushed.

[Hoser]

aha, Yelram got you good,you fucker!

He sure did. :(

[Hoser]

Have you tried not doing that?

Why didn't you say this before hand. FUCK!!!! Thanks alot.

[Hodge]

The girl I had to say no to last winter was telling me about the slime she's been sleeping with lately. It makes me depressed that such a hot piece of ass that I could have had my way with has no standards at all.
Even after nailing other chicks in the meantime I was still sexually frustrated with the "build-up" we had.
We're hanging out next week.

I'm bored.

[Hoser]

Your peen is going to fall off or at very least start oozzing something.

[Hodge]

I'm def' wrapping that shit up.