What happened?

[Claydon]

What happened to me? Has this happened to you? So I am not sure if this is an appropriate topic for the philo thread, and I am quite certain that the arch rape room will be open for business if he feels this is not an appropriate thread.

My friend and I were drinking last night, he just had his birthday and we were kind of staring into our beers and he suddenly asked "What happened"? I asked him what he meant and he said, "What happened to us, when did we get to be this way?" He was referring to when we became "adults". We went back and forth about this and to be honest I cannot honestly answer this question. I know it is not a matter of one day we awoke and we were adults, I know it is evolution of many factors. However, his query is still valid and I began to reflect on my own life. When and how did this happen. I use to do weed, and coke, go to raves all night and then work all day, I use to think that $150 in my checking account was all the money in the world, I use to eat top ramen and a can of chicken breast meat and know it was the best damn meal, and now? Now I monitor my IRA, drink scotch and wine instead of coca cola by the bucket load, listen to NPR, watch PBS, and god....even read in bed next to my wife like my parents have done for 36 years.

Now, the question for all of you is, how and why does this happen? Are we merely emulating what we see around us? Is this what society tells us? Or are we just fulfilling whatever marketing demographic some ad agency in New York has created.

Discuss...

[hatepoppy]

wanna discuss how the point of your quote is out of context w the point of your post?

[Pax Britannia]

Adulthood seems to be defined by responsibility. So the older we get and the more responsibility we take on the more adult we become. That may explain why the older generation are pissed at modern 20 somethings for 'acting like kids'. These days its becomming more acceptible to fuck around for a large section of your life before settling down.

Just my view anyway.

[Claydon]

wanna discuss how the point of your quote is out of context w the point of your post?


the quote has everything to do with my post. a child becoming and adult....

[hatepoppy]

the quote has everything to do with my post. a child becoming and adult....
sure, when taken out of context. it's a metaphor.

this was a statement made by paul, to the corinthians, trying to explain man's relationship with god.

it was paul's contention that he, as a child (representing the ignorant corinthians, squabbling over who among them is closer to god) may have thought he knew things that were over his head. still, he childishly spoke on them righteously. when he became a man (representing all man post-resurrection) and gained perspective, things he misunderstood before became clear to him.

When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love. (1Corinthians 13: 11-13)

you think you know god, but trust that you do not. such conflict is a childish exercise in vanity. you know god only in fleeting glimpses within yourself. even i, who knew christ, and hence know him in some small way more than you, do not know god. when he comes, then will we know him, as well as he knows us. for now, busy yourself with faith, hope and love.

this is an admonishment, not some revelation about his own maturity. i did think it comically ironic that he, while scolding these children for squabbling over proximity to god, pointed out that he knows god better than they through his association w hayzeus.

[Pax Britannia]

The Bible's funny like that.

[Claydon]

sure, when taken out of context. it's a metaphor.

this was a statement made by paul, to the corinthians, trying to explain man's relationship with god.

it was paul's contention that he, as a child (representing the ignorant corinthians, squabbling over who among them is closer to god) may have thought he knew things that were over his head. still, he childishly spoke on them righteously. when he became a man (representing all man post-resurrection) and gained perspective, things he misunderstood before became clear to him.

When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love. (1Corinthians 13: 11-13)

"you think you know god, but trust that you do not. such conflict is a childish exercise in vanity. you know god only in fleeting glimpses within yourself. even i, who knew christ, and hence know him in some small way more than you, do not know god. when he comes, then will we know him, as well as he knows us. for now, busy yourself with faith, hope and love."

this is an admonishment, not some revelation about his own maturity. i did think it comically ironic that he, while scolding these children for squabbling over proximity to god, pointed out that he knows god better than they through his association w hayzeus.


great...now back on topic....

[Quantum Leap]

Its our right as God fearing Americans to interpret the bible literally, god dammit!

[Claydon]

how bout this, how about i take out the bible verse and we get back on topic?

yah?!

[hatepoppy]

great...now back on topic....
i am on topic.

u thought u KNEW the quote and spoke on it righteously on your own and in retort, but i, through my association w the bible, knew it better! ur a child, im a man!

YOURE A FUCKING CORINTHIAN!

[hatepoppy]

Its our right as God fearing Americans to interpret the bible literally, god dammit!
obama did it in his inauguration address. w this same passage.

[Pax Britannia]

The fact that Hatepoppy has facial hair makes his argument more persuasive. Thoughts?

[Claydon]

i am on topic.

u thought u KNEW the quote and spoke on it righteously on your own and in retort, but i, through my association w the bible, knew it better! ur a child, im a man!

YOURE A FUCKING CORINTHIAN!


i am well aware of what the verse meant, and i thought (in error) it would make a nice intro to the thread.

NOW CAN WE PLEASE GET ON FUCKING TOPIC, JESUS CHRIST.

[hatepoppy]

The fact that Hatepoppy has facial hair makes his argument more persuasive. Thoughts?
i was totally born on the 12th day of christmas, man. i'm sooo closer to jesus than claydon!

[}{arlequin]

These days its becomming more acceptible to fuck around for a large section of your life before settling down
i'm a big fan of this.


although at times i have to be responsible

[Pax Britannia]

i was totally born on the 12th day of christmas, man. i'm sooo closer to jesus than claydon!

Your 13 days closer to Christ that Claydon. 13 is an unlucky number hence YOU ARE THE ANTI-CHRIST!

[Claydon]

lock this thread...

the gayness of gmf never ceases to amaze me.

[Pax Britannia]

lock this thread...

the gayness of gmf never ceases to amaze me.

http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp346/jballew7/294pctx.jpg

[hatepoppy]

did you expect this to be epic?

ur feeling old, end of story.

[Jericho]

2 days from 30. sigh

[Claydon]

did you expect this to be epic?

ur feeling old, end of story.

ummm not really, if anything my friend was feeling old, and I am merely wondering ..... what happened.

[hatepoppy]

ummm not really, if anything my friend was feeling old, and I am merely wondering ..... what happened.
youre just being such a fucking vagina about it.

"wondering....*le sighhhzzz*....what happened?"

awesome how you imply thoughtfulness and reflection with ellipses. makes you seem about at heady as a 14yr old girl writing freeform emo poetry.

[hatepoppy]

2 days from 30. sigh
^^^like this guy

[kid_vidrio]

Possessions. You start keeping shit. Then your shit keeps shit. Then you need room for all that. Then you stay home to play with or watch over your shit so you don't just split on a road trip at midnight. Soon, you lose touch with people who aren't collecting shit cuz neither party wants to be compared to the other. Then you break up or get divorced and feel young for about two months and then start all over.

Personally, I have felt what you're describing a few times. LIke this morning when I realized that 40 Oz to Freedom is 13+ years old and it seems like I was smokink/drinking/fucking (all hail the three kings!) to it yesterday.
Then I think about the 50+ years in front of me and quit crying.

[Claydon]

Material gain probably does play a major role. If i look at myself 12 years ago I was basically renting a shit hole studio apartment no bigger than the hole in the wall arch lives in, and it was pretty much a place for me to sleep, smoke pot, and play video games. Now I have 'things' and I want a large space to put them in.....and well...you already stated the rest.

[Da Raider]

let's fuck.

- James Banon

[kid_vidrio]

They also give you annual markers.
"remember that ugly ass lamp we got on vacation back in _______? damn. we're getting old!"

[hatepoppy]

Material gain probably does play a major role. If i look at myself 12 years ago I was basically renting a shit hole studio apartment no bigger than the hole in the wall arch lives in, and it was pretty much a place for me to sleep, smoke pot, and play video games. Now I have 'things' and I want a large space to put them in.....and well...you already stated the rest.
it's about satisfaction. 12 yrs ago u were probably happy as a bearded clam to be getting stoned and playing goldeneye. anymore, those silly, instant gratifications arent as satisfying anymore. youve had your fill, and youre looking for satisfaction elsewhere.

by consequence of nothing more than time, youve come to find satisfaction in accomplishment and ownership. sure, youll still play some xbox at times, but you wont do it for a weekend. youll smoke on occasion, but not 17 times a day, everyday. these are things that youve had enough of to wear off the luster with which they were painted by the new freedom of leaving your parents house and doing as you pleased.

being a kid just doesnt 'do it' for you anymore.

[BeeRand]

An obvious answer would be biological/neurological development. But if you'd prefer something intangible, then I would say that it's in our nature to adapt to our surroundings. And when placed into an adult world with responsibilities and consequences, we behave accordingly.

[wonderllama]

I think what happened is often associated with acknowledging that there are consequences to your actions.

As a kid, or the mind of a kid like most people in this place, you can do as you like without worrying about any consequences. It's why internet anonymity perpetuates the juvenile behaviour in us...we can bag the shit out of people and not worry that they're going to punch you in the fucking face!

Having kids, paying bills and having a proper job (not stacking shelves at the mall) all contribute to mental maturity. Unless you're a 12 year old English boy.

[}{arlequin]

this whole topic has a tinge of angst and concern about it. the 'friend's idea and now i'm just wondering' part seems like a ruse.

whatsa matter clay, wedding blues? not in a position in life you had hoped to be? money vs. responsibilities started to weigh down on you?

just.relax. take it all in. you're gonna get out of this hole same way you got out of the last one from 5/10 yrs ago: without even realizing it.


stop being such a worrier

[Archetype]

So that's why you have sex with all them young'ns.

[Morfin]

Now, the question for all of you is, how and why does this happen? Are we merely emulating what we see around us? Is this what society tells us? Or are we just fulfilling whatever marketing demographic some ad agency in New York has created.

How did you get to where you are today? By the choices that you've made -- good and bad, mature and immature. It is natural to look back and think "If only ..." with regrets about past girlfriends, activities, studies, being an underachiever, being a fuck-up. You're getting older, which means you have more "yesterdays" to think back on, to wish you could change. Welcome to growing older.

As to whether you are emulating what society tells you (I assume you mean, to act like you see (or think you see) other people acting, or whether you are a function of marketing, well, here's my thought. To the extent that you let yourself be guided by others or your perceptions of what you "should" do, rather than making affirmative choices, then you have no one to blame but yourself. Have enough self-confidence to make your own choices about what you like, rather than following the crowd.

My suggestion for when you find yourself falling into a funk about regrets and "What's happened to me?" and "How did I get here?" is to listen to Springsteen's Glory Days and realize how pathetic the people are who dwell on the past. And if you have marriage regret? Man up. You made your decision -- deal with it. Besides that, only a self-centered, immature fool spends his time thinking "Man, if only I hadn't gotten married, man, I'd be having fun now." A mature person understands the ups and downs of marriage and that, overall, married life is pretty good. As you get older, this will become clearer and clearer.

Father lecture over.

[UNC]

I have yet to grow up

[UNC]

I did however give up

[}{arlequin]

So I am not sure if this is an appropriate topic for the philo thread,
upon further review, i believe this belongs in the emo thread

[Archetype]

How did you get to where you are today? By the choices that you've made -- good and bad, mature and immature. It is natural to look back and think "If only ..." with regrets about past girlfriends, activities, studies, being an underachiever, being a fuck-up. You're getting older, which means you have more "yesterdays" to think back on, to wish you could change. Welcome to growing older.

You're old.

[}{arlequin]

You're old.
but on the inside, he's all gmf!

[Claydon]

jesus christ people, I was not the one getting emo or philo about this subject, it truly was my friend of 15 years who was crying into his beer. I thought it was an interesting subject of discussion hence i posted it in philo thread.


I mean...how many times can we discuss "was jesus real" and "why do we exist"........

[hatepoppy]

who's jesus?

[}{arlequin]

you've got some weaksauce friends. if any of mine did that they'd have hell about it for years. and vice versa.

[hatepoppy]

seriously, whos this puerto rican?

[BeeRand]

I wish I could go back in time.... I'd take state.

[hatepoppy]

is state a drug?

[Archetype]

jesus christ people, I was not the one getting emo or philo about this subject, it truly was my friend of 15 years who was crying into his beer. I thought it was an interesting subject of discussion hence i posted it in philo thread.


I mean...how many times can we discuss "was jesus real" and "why do we exist"........
Pretty sure Arch deletes every "why do we exist thread" and there's never been a "was jesus real" thread since I've been here. Insomniac, for one, posts a lot of weird and interesting topics, and Arch has his crazy rants of braininess every so often. You need to pay more attention to the philo forum if you're gonna criticize it.

[Intoxicated]

I'm going through this too. Although I do feel it falls under the 'why do we exist' thread.

You feel this shit because you are older. You are settled, and you are most likely not happy with the lame ass adult you have become.

I know because I'm feeling the same way.

I wanted to be different. I wanted to change things. Now I'm content to have a drink each night, and be thankful I'm not being anally raped by my enemy.

These are the questions we privileged folk get to ask as our buzz wears off.

Introspection is a sure way to ruin a good night of drinking. Next time your friend does this I suggest you play the black eye game.

[Spanky]

You became a pussy, end of discussion. Live the dream.

[Archangel]

I should move this to the emo thread.


Oh, and Claydon, nice barb with the "hole in the wall"; good thing you lived at Blenheim fucking Palace when you were in grad school.

[Claydon]

And the gmf gayness does not fail me!!!

[Morfin]

No, but you have failed GMF.

[}{arlequin]

we aim to pee please

[HAWK]

You became a pussy, end of discussion. Live the dream.

lulz

I'm 30 yrs old and can probably identify with some of the points brought up by Claydon. However, just because I'm not 18 anymore doesn't mean I can't have a full life. I do what I want just like I did when I was a teenager...except now I have the money to do even more.

It sounds to me that someone might regret a few things. And that has nothing to do with age. Just missed opportunities.

[Archetype]

Shut your trap, geezer.

[hatepoppy]

NO U!

[Claydon]

lulz

I'm 30 yrs old and can probably identify with some of the points brought up by Claydon. However, just because I'm not 18 anymore doesn't mean I can't have a full life. I do what I want just like I did when I was a teenager...except now I have the money to do even more.

It sounds to me that someone might regret a few things. And that has nothing to do with age. Just missed opportunities.

I regret some things (my friend regrets MANY things), but nothing too bad. I actually like my life a lot, I have no debt, a wonderful wife, my health is good, and money in my pocket. And yes, it is very true that I can do the things I wanted to do when I was younger because I have money.

[Hodge]

I knew I was old when I started getting hangovers on a consistent basis.
This liver is toast.

[Claydon]

I knew I was old when I started getting hangovers on a consistent basis.
This liver is toast.

slap that shit and tell it to man up

[wonderllama]

Just do a Larry Hagman, slaughter the original, then trade up to a new one...

[Archetype]

I knew I was old when I started getting hangovers on a consistent basis.
This liver is toast.
I don't know what a hangover is anymore, I'm just constantly dehydrated. You should feel my asshole.











Wait, that's not related.

[Archangel]

How the fuck is this still going?

[Trident]

My parents lame dog kept going for years after he should have died.

[Phil Theehor]

How the fuck is this still going?

My parents lame dog kept going for years after he should have died.


The bumps might have something to do with it.

[hatepoppy]

old ppl sukk!

[Morfin]

No they don't. Ima get my posse of blue-haired bitches and they'll beat the curls outta yur fro with their canes.

[Morfin]

Bump! (Ooops, shoulda waited until tomorrow.)

[Trident]

http://i316.photobucket.com/albums/mm359/adminscottj/IBTL-Shining.jpg!

[Deadhead Derek]

the reality of what Claydon was asking about the how did we get to where we are, is that we become aware of our own mortality. That gauge is what we measure our past actions, and mark what we have achieved against the idea of how much time we have left before we slough off this mortal coil. That we in our 40's know we are at the 1/2 way mark makes it all that more sharp a flavor. I don't think it is as based on coins in the pocket, but the lasting marks on the world we look to see in our dossier. IMO

[hatepoppy]

http://i316.photobucket.com/albums/mm359/adminscottj/IBTL-Shining.jpg!
if he was in before the lock, why smash up the door. this doesnt make any sense.

[redsox39]

I just picked my nose.

[hatepoppy]

what happened?

[redsox39]

I wiped it on the bottom of the chair next to me

[Morfin]

The Deadhead is on to something here.

Looking at it from the perspective of someone in his 40s (and almost his 50s), I think the "regret" or looking back is more a function of reality having pwned us all. Kind of like finding out there's no Santa Claus.

When we were teenagers, we all thought we were invincible, going to marry hot chicks, going to be rich, going to be a pro athlete. Then, we got to college and realized that we aren't going to be pro athletes and the chicks we pulled weren't all so hot. But... we still had our careers and they will be exciting. Like being a doctor, or a lawyer, or whatever, going to save the world, never going to change, not going to be like our parents, open-minded. Fuck, yeah.

And then you get out of school and reality cunt-punches you. You realize that being a lawyer can be cool, at times, but 95% of the time, it is boring, repetitive or you're sitting around waiting. Same with any profession: the vast majority of work is boring, repetitive, etc. And you aren't going to be rich and retire by 40. And the woman you married ain't Gisele and, holy fuck, she's aged, too.

It's not so much regret as reality. Getting your eyes open and understanding that life isn't like Boston Legal, or ER, or CSI, it, generally, sucks. And, boy, don't you wish you could go back to the days of college when you just drinked and partied, before your eyes got opened? Yeah, we all do.

Deal with it, man up, and do your best.

Sorry, that's dad lecture #2 in this thread.

[freegood]

Well I'm going to drink REAL Coke while I'm still young. It'll be like the commercials.

Take that, Morfin.

[Morfin]

Fucker. I used drink that too. Oh, the good old days. What's happened to me? Hmm, maybe I should start a thread.

[Phil Theehor]

The Deadhead is on to something here.

Looking at it from the perspective of someone in his 40s (and almost his 50s), I think the "regret" or looking back is more a function of reality having pwned us all. Kind of like finding out there's no Santa Claus.

When we were teenagers, we all thought we were invincible, going to marry hot chicks, going to be rich, going to be a pro athlete. Then, we got to college and realized that we aren't going to be pro athletes and the chicks we pulled weren't all so hot. But... we still had our careers and they will be exciting. Like being a doctor, or a lawyer, or whatever, going to save the world, never going to change, not going to be like our parents, open-minded. Fuck, yeah.

And then you get out of school and reality cunt-punches you. You realize that being a lawyer can be cool, at times, but 95% of the time, it is boring, repetitive or you're sitting around waiting. Same with any profession: the vast majority of work is boring, repetitive, etc. And you aren't going to be rich and retire by 40. And the woman you married ain't Gisele and, holy fuck, she's aged, too.

It's not so much regret as reality. Getting your eyes open and understanding that life isn't like Boston Legal, or ER, or CSI, it, generally, sucks. And, boy, don't you wish you could go back to the days of college when you just drinked and partied, before your eyes got opened? Yeah, we all do.

Deal with it, man up, and do your best.

Sorry, that's dad lecture #2 in this thread.

Man, that's really good. I wonder if Morfin's firm hires a guy to follow him around and start slow claps. Judging from what we see here, Morfin's orations would probably warrant said slow-clap a couple times a week.

But back on topic: growing up isn't that bad. I'm smarter today than back then, my means are much greater, I know myself much better and don't piss away time on things that aren't worth it. I love being a Dad and owning a house (although it takes all of my time) and I am better at what do for a living than anything else I have ever done.

All in all, it's not so bad. All I really miss from college (and after) is the amount of time I had. You don't notice it when you have it. It's not until you get to the point that you need 26 hours in a day that you realize how much of your life you pissed away watching television. It hurts that you can't get that back.

My only regret is that I did not have sex with more girls (I've mentioned this before, it's become a theme). Had I to do it over again, I would tap a far broader cross-section of females. (Disclaimer: I'm not even saying that I would do this by improving my game. My game was average on my best day. No, I would attain a higher number of girls laid simply by reducing, perhaps eliminating, my standards. If it had four limbs and tolerable breath I would hit it.)

[Archangel]

Baaaa?

[Archetype]

. I'm smarter today than back then, my means are much greater, I know myself much better and don't piss away time on things that aren't worth it.

*Slowly looks at top left of the page*

Yup, still says GMF.

[Phil Theehor]

*Slowly looks at top left of the page*

Yup, still says GMF.

Funny, young JJ, funny. I like GMF. It's a break that I can fit in with the rest of my life right now. Given that my life has become such a mature, responsibility-laden existence, shooting the shit (and making dick jokes, and trading porn) with a pretty diverse group of guys scattered across three continents is quite worthwhile. So, I'll find time for this.

And that's the point: I only do things that I enjoy or that I need to do. Everything else I've let slide. That is one of the ways my life has improved.