Off-Topic IV

[Mustard]

That mini buffalo ranch chicken sandwich song is awful.

[Face]

try blinking every now and then

[White.Rabbit]

try blinking every now and then
time to put on the sexy librarian glasses.

[Stax]

http://www.unleashedpics.com/Pics/Thumbs/S1/S_2062_m1.jpg (http://www.unleashedpics.com/Pics/Viewer.php?file=S1/2062_m1.jpg)

[ShitBreak]

Did anyone else see the fucking creepy bald dude from the show FRINGE at the All-Star game?

TV character promotion FTW!

[POO POO CANNON]

wat

[ElemenoP]

I want marissa miller's workout plan.

[Stax]

I want marissa miller's workout plan.

I want Marisa Miller's vagina, legs, ass, tits, mouth, or some combination thereof on me.

[Pox]

Its annoying how the latest posts thing in the bottom right brings you to the first page of the thread you click on. Whats the point?

[dick_darlington]

http://www.unleashedpics.com/Pics/Thumbs/S1/S_2062_m1.jpg (http://www.unleashedpics.com/Pics/Viewer.php?file=S1/2062_m1.jpg)
hawt.. id rather beat off to this than ladyboy gaga.

[Jericho]

Cool poll question on AOTS today:
Would you give up porn forever if it meant that you'd never have to pay for videogames again?

The verdict was 64% yes

[DjAg]

Cool poll question on AOTS today:
Would you give up porn forever if it meant that you'd never have to pay for videogames again?

The verdict was 64% yes

Fuck no, I play most games on the PC, and most are for 'free'. Your sources are just dumb and stupid and retarded and gay.

[dick_darlington]

i would say no only because i don't play video games that often anymore.

[Stax]

hawt.. id rather beat off to this than ladyboy gaga.

Why are you trying to beat off to Gaga?

[Face]

Cool poll question on AOTS today:
Would you give up porn forever if it meant that you'd never have to pay for videogames again?

The verdict was 64% yes
most of 'em probably wouldn't last 3 days

lord knows that's about the longest I can manage

[Stax]

Fuck no, I play most games on the PC, and most are for 'free'. Your sources are just dumb and stupid and retarded and gay.

Yeah. If the question was something better, like porn vs.... I dunno cars (but normal cars, not crazy) or something it might make sense, but the occasional 50 bucks falls far short of tamping down my sexual frustration so I don't kill/rape/rape-kill someone.

[ElemenoP]

Did someone find me and Anita, Marissa Miller's workout plan?????

[Stax]

Did someone find me and Anita, Marissa Miller's workout plan?????

Wut?

[BIG PIZZLE]

Here's my workout plan. Step 1. Eat; Step 2. Get high; Step 3. Jerk it!

[Stax]

Here's my workout plan. Step 1. Eat; Step 2. Get high; Step 3. Jerk it!

Mine's simpler.

1. Eat
2. Jerk off
3. Sleep

[dick_darlington]

Did someone find me and Anita, Marissa Miller's workout plan?????
yeah, it's purging and a shitload of crunches.

[Face]

step 4, profit!

[Stax]

step 4, profit!

Don't forget steal underpants and ????? .

[Jericho]

Yeah. If the question was something better, like porn vs.... I dunno cars (but normal cars, not crazy) or something it might make sense, but the occasional 50 bucks falls far short of tamping down my sexual frustration so I don't kill/rape/rape-kill someone.

The occasional 50 bucks? I didn't view it that way. I saw it as I could have every game and peripheral no matter how shitty,always.

And it didn't say no jacking off. Just not porn. I thought you were resourceful

[Stax]

The occasional 50 bucks? I didn't view it that way. I saw it as I could have every game and peripheral no matter how shitty,always.

And it didn't say no jacking off. Just not porn. I thought you were resourceful

Both very valid points. That's always the problem with questions talking about free stuff, you can take it to a crazy extreme. Like, buy 300 XBox's, sell for monies, and pay for a trip to Vegas + hookers which = better than pr0nz.

[ShitBreak]

Stax has already thought his shit through.

[Stax]

Stax has already thought his shit through.

The amount of time spent thinking about sex is inversely related to the amount of time spent having sex.

[Face]

my dad just bought a god damned iphone... what is the world coming to?

[and]

my dad just bought a god damned iphone... what is the world coming to?

iDunno?

[BIG PIZZLE]

my dad just bought a god damned iphone... what is the world coming to?

Everyone is biting my style yo.

[Jocko]

my dad just bought a god damned iphone... what is the world coming to?


Ooooooh. Have him talk to Pizzle. I'm sure he'd love to talk to your Dad. 'Cuz if you haven't heard. Pizz has an iPhone

[Face]

iDunno?
points to the n00b with the witty retort!

[and]

i can has babez forum?

[Face]

my points don't mean shit, you can't redeem them for anything

[BIG PIZZLE]

i can has babez forum?

Just cuz you made an iPhone joke and because I dont want to deal with you for the nex 5 minutes.

http://img201.imagevenue.com/loc137/th_37449_KristinaR-jhaa_123_137lo.jpg (http://www.anonym.to/?http://img201.imagevenue.com/img.php?loc=loc137&image=37449_KristinaR-jhaa_123_137lo.jpg)

Code:
http://rapidshare.com/files/253330854/KR-jhaa.part1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/253321188/KR-jhaa.part2.rar

[Stax]

Lulz, that is a good vid Pizz, but it seems like you LOVE it.

[and]

Just cuz you made an iPhone joke and because I dont want to deal with you for the nex 5 minutes.

http://img201.imagevenue.com/loc137/th_37449_KristinaR-jhaa_123_137lo.jpg (http://www.anonym.to/?http://img201.imagevenue.com/img.php?loc=loc137&image=37449_KristinaR-jhaa_123_137lo.jpg)

Code:
http://rapidshare.com/files/253330854/KR-jhaa.part1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/253321188/KR-jhaa.part2.rar


Cool. Thanks.

[BIG PIZZLE]

Lulz, that is a good vid Pizz, but it seems like you LOVE it.

I figured I'd give him something I enjoyed.

[Pox]

Cool. Thanks.

Thats actually the only video in the babe forum, so there really nothing else to see here.

[jemeske]

The rest is just dick drawings I made.

http://i25.tinypic.com/257gcwi.gif

[and]

The rest is just dick drawings I made.

http://i25.tinypic.com/257gcwi.gif

ii prefer carpet over hard wood.

[jemeske]

http://i29.tinypic.com/wbuotw.jpg

[jemeske]

I just watched my first Breaking Bad episode.

[Hodge]

ii prefer carpet over hard wood.
It looks like half-mast to me.

[WET HOT MESS]

test

[Face]

D-

[WET HOT MESS]

you're an F for faylure

[Mustard]

My internet is the blows.

[WET HOT MESS]

WHY IS THIS PLACE SO DEAD RIGHT NOW?!

[jemeske]

Why is your face so homosexual? Some things we will never know.

[Hodge]

WHY IS THIS PLACE SO DEAD RIGHT NOW?!
The cloud of System_Admin is a storm I will not enter.

[Mustard]

I require boobies.

[leafsmack0]

Holy CRAP

[Jericho]

I require boobies.

Good thing you has them then

[WET HOT MESS]

i like my gayface, thank you very much

[Mustard]

Good thing you has them then
I require other womens boobies!

Mine are just too sexy to consider.

[leafsmack0]

I'm crying on the inside

[WET HOT MESS]

you're ugly likeee meeee, i can see through you

[Jericho]

Ahhhh,, youse guys. I'll be good night crew employee today. This place has been dying at night lately

[WET HOT MESS]

yay!

[Jericho]

gimme kisses!

[Face]

damn dude, mcclane just stabbed a dude in the eye with an icicle, that's fucking cold man!

[WET HOT MESS]

ICE COLD!

[Jericho]

damn dude, mcclane just stabbed a dude in the eye with an icicle, that's fucking cold man!

Jeeezusss...fuckinnnn duuuude

[WET HOT MESS]

gimme kisses!
did you brush your teef?

[jemeske]

Twice last month!

[Mustard]

Let's tawlk.

[Jericho]

did you brush your teef?

Not yet. You loves salami breaff!

[WET HOT MESS]

ahhh

[Jericho]

Can't keep er goin by myself, hebros

[WET HOT MESS]

i'm about to go to bed to masturbate my arm off.

[Face]

Can't keep er goin by myself, hebros
well you're gonna have to, broel

[Face]

in other news, fuck youtube and their god damned 10 minute max upload length, now I gotta re-edit this shit all over again

[WET HOT MESS]

suckaa

[Face]

suckaa
its bullshit, my video is around 11:30, and I've posted shit that long before that wasn't rejected, and there's shit on youtube that's way longer than that!

[Jericho]

Well stop being such a blowhard

[Face]

NO

[WET HOT MESS]

wahwahwah

[Jericho]

If it makes any difference, no one gives a shit about seeing it, buddy.

[Face]

:mad:

[Mustard]

If it makes any difference, no one gives a shit about seeing it, buddy.
That cold bro.

ice cold!

[jemeske]

Any video longer than 10 is from a partner or something. Any video blogging nerd should know that.

[Face]

I've seen videos from regular joes that are more than 30 minutes long, hell I saw a video from another model building geek that was nearly a fucking hour

[jemeske]

Prove it.

[Jericho]

Oh shi- Jem with the gauntlet

[Face]

Prove it.
Uqj8_KF-97w

I couldn't find the hour long vid, so I hope this will suffice

[Da Raider]

FU FACE!

[jemeske]

That's from a youtube partner. Duh. Hence the ad on the video page and shit like that.

[Jericho]

Shitstained Balls!

[jemeske]

I like where you're taking this...

[Billy]

Christ. I just got offered a job as a tutor for the science department at the university that I have no intention of taking. Just out of curiosity I looked at their site, and realized that even though it's a university program, they actually charge students extra to use their tutors. Not only that it's expensive as fuck, somewhere along the lines of $2300/semester for undergrads. Now I'm actually curious of how well they pay if that's what they're charging

[Face]

That's from a youtube partner. Duh. Hence the ad on the video page and shit like that.
well shit... lemme keep looking

[Face]

bah, fuck it

[jemeske]

SNAP!

[Mustard]

Face, you quitter. YOU CAN DO IT!!!

[Face]

apparently I can't... or more specifically, I don't care enough to

incidentally, new vids in my sig, OMG!!

[Face]

I NEED SCISSORS!! 61!!

[Jericho]

*has break up sex wih gmf*

[Face]

you'll be back

they always come back

...

well... except debastet

and amy

and manny

and g-man

and sweet D

and hashy

...

I'm sad

[Bastard]

I NEED SCISSORS!! 61!!

Good luck finding attractive lesbians at this hour.

[Mustard]

I miss HashbrownX

[Jericho]

Holy shit! It's Bastard! You better explain your absence

[Bastard]

Holy shit! It's Bastard! You better explain your absence


Sorry, I was away for awhile. My penis had commitments for pleasuring a woman and it insisted that I come along.

[Ninja Pope]

Back-to-back "HOPE" poster parodies!

[Bastard]

Awesome.

What’s going on with this place? The hooker I just strangled is more talkative than the people in this OT.

[Mustard]

I'm fucking a hot dog bun. Or I'm a fucking hot dog bun.

Either way things are good.

[Bizz]

Awesome.

What’s going on with this place? The hooker I just strangled is more talkative than the people in this OT.

I'll tell you what's not cool, killing hookers. Hookers are people too, naked people who may be willing to pleasure you for a price you negotiate later behind the curtain of a VIP room. Besides, there's no reason to kill them, 'cause most of them are already dead inside.

[Mustard]

But you don't have to pay the dead ones. See?

[Bizz]

Jew

[Mustard]

Where?

[Pox]

Where?

behind 9/11

[Mustard]

Oh. So that explains all of the crying during sex?

[Mustard]

You're all bald!

All of you!

[Bizz]

I need a hair cut.

[Pox]

http://funnyyahooanswers.com/img/howcanhumanracesurvivenext100yrs.jpg

[mxlplkt]

I'm not sure how to respond to that

[hatepoppy]

i lold.

[kaptino]

I must have fucking alzheimer's or something as I know hardly any of you fuckers.

[mxlplkt]

Your just not used to seeing me with my pants on.

[kaptino]

I didn't know that it was possible to make pants big enough for your fat ass...

[UNC]

Hey Ya

[NOTKyle]

Hi Marc

[TylerDurden]

christ, this place is dying a slow death.

[ShitBreak]

So...I don't get to get out of my beer ticket. I actually have to go to court.

It's going to end up costing me like 300 bucks for having ONE fucking unopened 6-point beer in my cooler when floating on the Illinois River.

[TylerDurden]

maybe i'm missing something... back story?

[ShitBreak]

maybe i'm missing something... back story?

Oklahoma is the only state in the nation that considers anything over 3.2% beer "high point and/or alcohol". Anything above 3.2 is not allowed on the Illinois River (where everyone goes to float), even though EVERYONE brings it.

Well we made fun of a chick's tits, a family threw us a Papst Blue Ribbon because we made teh funny, and then about 30 minutes later, we got asked to pull to the side, and all 3 of us got a ticket for the unopened, high point beer in our cooler.

[TylerDurden]

ah, i thought you were actually in illinois on our river. the only reason to even float down that river is to get fucking gizacked on various alcoholic beverages. shit, if i got a ticket for every time i talked to the coast guard with an open container of lemonade/vodka i'd owe them more than my student loans.

moral of the story: oklahomo fucking sucks. time to move, dude. time to move.

[ShitBreak]

For everything that is awesome about Oklahoma...there are 2 things that completely suck about it.

[TylerDurden]

For everything that is awesome about Oklahoma...there are 2 things that completely suck about it.

i think your ratio is a bit off.

0:n awesome/suck ratio where n is infinity.

name one (if you can) redeeming quality to that entire back-ass state.

[ShitBreak]

Well lets see. I have a good job, my whole family lives here, all of my friends live here, my alma mater is only an hour away, it's one of the less costly places to live in the country, I'm only about 5 hours away from either Dallas or KC...

[ElemenoP]

Living 5 hours away from Dallas isn't considered a great thing.

It's STILL 5 hours.

and it's Dallas.

[ElemenoP]

And how do you know that OK is that amazing if you haven't lived anywhere outside of the state? It sounds like settling and being comfortable.

Until you leave the state and experience something worse or better -- there's no scale of comparison.

[ShitBreak]

Why experience something worse when there is nothing wrong here? It's easy for you to say, when you have mommy and daddy's money in your back-pocket, and don't have to work.

I've always been a "if it isn't broke, don't fix it" type of person. And right now, I have a pretty good job that I actually don't hate, my own place, and live pretty decent.

[ElemenoP]

But how would you know if something's worse if you haven't tried it. It just sounds like pessimism to me.

[Candycane]

"Ladies ladies, I go by Shitbrick on the Internets"

[ShitBreak]

It's pessimistic to like my fucking life? Reeeeeeeeeally?

I fucking LIKE Oklahoma, and yet you think that's wrong. How would YOU know unless YOU had lived here?

Double standard.

[Limp]

Fuck me.

[ElemenoP]

It's pessimistic to like my fucking life? Reeeeeeeeeally?

I fucking LIKE Oklahoma, and yet you think that's wrong. How would YOU know unless YOU had lived here?

Double standard.

That's not the point of my post. Why are you getting so defensive?

I'm just sayign that you're still in your 20s. You sometimes complain about the general situation in your life and I;m just pushing you try something new before you wake up one day, fatter than you are now, working the same job and looking for an overpriced home in a sudivision.

[Archangel]

And how do you know that OK is that amazing if you haven't lived anywhere outside of the state? It sounds like settling and being comfortable.

Until you leave the state and experience something worse or better -- there's no scale of comparison.

It's OSU fucking Mike. He does this shit all the time, remember?

Like when he was talking about Applebee's or something as if it was the fanciest place on earth.

[ShitBreak]

When did I fucking complain about my life lately? Only thing I bitched about was fucking retarded cops. That's nothing against me, my life, or Oklahoma. Just douchebag cops.

For fuck's sake.

[DjAg]

It's OSU fucking Mike. He does this shit all the time, remember?

Like when he was talking about Applebee's or something as if it was the fanciest place on earth.

Shenanigans, we all know that's Olive Garden.

[TylerDurden]

Until you leave the state and experience something worse or better -- there's no scale of comparison.

this is true.

It's easy for you to say, when you have mommy and daddy's money in your back-pocket, and don't have to work.

this is also true.

Why experience something worse when there is nothing wrong here?

she's right: you're settling. if i had to chose from your list there's not one of them that would justify my staying in one particular location. job? i'm a hot commodity; i can pretty much have whatever wherever. family? i love my family, but i cut the umbilical a long fucking time ago. furthermore, air fare is cheap these days so visiting is a few mouse clicks away.

you have it a lot better than i do, though: you don't have a child keeping you pinned in one location, and even then it's only temporary. you need to save up some fucking money and do a little traveling. do some research. indianapolis, atlanta, boston, new york, etc. are all places that would be fantastic and interesting places to live. why settle for anything?

furthermore you're stifling your potentials pool by living in that backward-ass state. do you even know how much prime ass is out there waiting to be had by an enterprising and outgoing lad like you? fucking christ, man. gtfo of that state. experience some goddamned culture.

convenience is the absolute worst reason to sustain anything.

[ElemenoP]

Did I say, LATELY? I just said SOMETIMES. AND GENERALLY.

[WET HOT MESS]

ow my head.

[Archangel]

Indianapolis?

[Alcestis]

Fuck me.

*looking at calender*

[Archangel]

When did I fucking complain about my life lately? Only thing I bitched about was fucking retarded cops. That's nothing against me, my life, or Oklahoma. Just douchebag cops.

For fuck's sake.

I remember you talking about how people who didn't live in the suburbs were stupid. And then, people who lived or had lived in actual interesting cities beat your arse down, at which point you broke down and did your self pity routine about how Oklahoma sucked.

[ShitBreak]

this is true.



this is also true.



she's right: you're settling. if i had to chose from your list there's not one of them that would justify my staying in one particular location. job? i'm a hot commodity; i can pretty much have whatever wherever. family? i love my family, but i cut the umbilical a long fucking time ago. furthermore, air fare is cheap these days so visiting is a few mouse clicks away.

you have it a lot better than i do, though: you don't have a child keeping you pinned in one location, and even then it's only temporary. you need to save up some fucking money and do a little traveling. do some research. indianapolis, atlanta, boston, new york, etc. are all places that would be fantastic and interesting places to live. why settle for anything?

furthermore you're stifling your potentials pool by living in that backward-ass state. do you even know how much prime ass is out there waiting to be had by an enterprising and outgoing lad like you? fucking christ, man. gtfo of that state. experience some goddamned culture.

convenience is the absolute worst reason to sustain anything.

I'm not saying there aren't more interesting places to live, or better shit out there...but where I am is good. I have a ton of fucking growth opportunities at my job, and I'm already making almost as much as the average two-person house is. And I've been raised as family-first ideal, and I actually like that. It's actually kind of cool. I mean I see my cousins, my uncle, and my mom and dad on a weekly basis. How many people can say that in a POSITIVE light?

[TylerDurden]

Indianapolis?

rated as one of the top places for twenty-somethings to set down roots. i'm a frequent visitor, and for the most part it's very clean and easy to navigate. the median purchase price for a home is also pretty low, if that's your thing.

[WET HOT MESS]

if it works for you, it's good enough. but do try to keep an open mind because change happens beyond your will.

[Limp]

*looking at calender*
Look for a 3 day window.. I have a few things I want to teach you.

[ShitBreak]

I remember you talking about how people who didn't live in the suburbs were stupid. And then, people who lived or had lived in actual interesting cities beat your arse down, at which point you broke down and did your self pity routine about how Oklahoma sucked.

There's no way I said that. I fucking live in the city. I did say I prefer the suburbs, especially as I get older.

[ShitBreak]

rated as one of the top places for twenty-somethings to set down roots. i'm a frequent visitor, and for the most part it's very clean and easy to navigate. the median purchase price for a home is also pretty low, if that's your thing.

I love Indy. Actually been there more than St. Louis. Love everything about Indy.

if it works for you, it's good enough. but do try to keep an open mind because change happens beyond your will.

Oh I do. Hell, I've already told my parents and friends that if this job for some strange reason didn't work out, I'd probably end up moving elsewhere. That's the #1 reason I'm staying here to be honest. My jerb.

[TylerDurden]

I'm not saying there aren't more interesting places to live, or better shit out there...but where I am is good. I have a ton of fucking growth opportunities at my job, and I'm already making almost as much as the average two-person house is. And I've been raised as family-first ideal, and I actually like that. It's actually kind of cool. I mean I see my cousins, my uncle, and my mom and dad on a weekly basis. How many people can say that in a POSITIVE light?

i'm a california transplant, and comparitively illinois fucking blows. however, i didn't figure that out until i actually got out and traveled. with that said family-first is good, but you'll never have a better time to explore and figure shit out than right now.

but what teh fuck do i know...

[Summer]

I'd almost live anywhere but my beloved Texas right now. It's been 100 fucking degrees and over for a month and a half.

[ShitBreak]

I'd almost live anywhere but my beloved Texas right now. It's been 100 fucking degrees and over for a month and a half.

No shit. The heat has been killer. Usually doesn't get 100 degrees until fucking late July/early August.

[WET HOT MESS]

weird, we've been getting spring-like weather all summer. i was afraid of a big humid mess this summer and we get this mild stuff. i kinda like it.

[ElemenoP]

It's been cooler up here. I enjoy the cool weather.

[Summer]

combine texas heat with coastal humidity and you'll think you're in hell. And then there's the rednecks.

[Archangel]

There's no way I said that. I fucking live in the city. I did say I prefer the suburbs, especially as I get older.

It was in OTII, so I can't prove it, but Kyle and Ms P here were present during that convo, I believe.

[Limp]

I'd kill for some rain right now.

[TylerDurden]

I'd almost live anywhere but my beloved Texas right now. It's been 100 fucking degrees and over for a month and a half.

there's a vacancy in my bed that needs filled.

[Archangel]

Also, I'm ready to kill people when the mercury hits 88 or so, I can't even imagine living in 100-degree humid heat.

[ElemenoP]

Yep. I can attest to that.

[Summer]

I'll make it rain (on them hoes)

[Summer]

there's a vacancy in my bed that needs filled.


I'm pretty annoying.

[TylerDurden]

I'm pretty annoying.

i'm okay with that; i have a nag/bitch/whine filter. although to be honest it's difficult to annoy me when your mouth is full or your face is buried in the pillow. just sayin'.

[ShitBreak]

Also, I'm ready to kill people when the mercury hits 88 or so, I can't even imagine living in 100-degree humid heat.

Guh...I wish. It's 11am, and it's already 92 degrees outside with 60% humidity.

[Summer]

i'm okay with that; i have a nag/bitch/whine filter. although to be honest it's difficult to annoy me when your mouth is full or your face is buried in the pillow. just sayin'.

rawr. where do I sign up?

[TylerDurden]

rawr. where do I sign up?

famous last words: i hope you enjoy the rough stuff.

[Summer]

I hope you like role playing, sailor.

[Limp]

TD is semen.

[TylerDurden]

I hope you like role playing, sailor.

aye.

[WET HOT MESS]

bump~!

[Void]

slump...

[WET HOT MESS]

dump

[TylerDurden]

i'm having a difficult time in deciding what i'd like to have for lunch (aside from summer). any ideas?

[DjAg]

Pulled pork sandwich. It's never a losing idea.

[ElemenoP]

i'm having a difficult time in deciding what i'd like to have for lunch (aside from summer). any ideas?
If I wasn't trying to lose weight, I'd get fried chicken.

[ElemenoP]

or Thai food.

[TylerDurden]

hmmm... shit like that sounds like it deserves to be slathered in sweet baby ray's bbq sauce. i'm not looking for anything that heavy. subway is sounding good. turkey and blackforest ham with lettuce, tomato, black olives, onions and banana peppers.

fuck. yes.

EDIT: @djag

[ElemenoP]

I only get tomatoes and cucumbers on my sandwiches. I'm a senior citizen like that.

[Void]

More like ElderlynoP

[TylerDurden]

I only get tomatoes and cucumbers on my sandwiches. I'm a senior citizen like that.

i dig cucumbers, but i'm honestly more of a zucchini guy. sliced, lightly cooked, just a little crispy on the skin.

[DjAg]

turkey and blackforest ham with lettuce, tomato, black olives, onions and banana peppers.

Sounds like the sub I usually get... Though it's always from Byrne Dairy

Herb bun, Turkey, both lettuces (different textures), onions, green peppers, 5-6 banana peppers (they can EASILY overpower the sub if you put too many), and a shit-ton of ceasar dressing, with a dash of pepper and shredded cheese.

[TylerDurden]

they can EASILY overpower the sub if you put too many

truth.

a few weeks back i was at a local jimmy john's. while ordering the #5 vito i looked the guy right in the eye and said, "light. on. the. peppers. and only of the banana kind."

i'll be damned if that fucking cunt didn't load my sandwich down with the hottest peppers they had on hand. which isn't the hottest thing ever, but when you're not expecting it... ruins the whole thing.

anyways the little fucker was snickering behind the counters with his co-workers when i took the first bite, so i went back up with the sandwich and handed it back and said, "i said LIGHT ON THE PEPPERS" with extra emphasis thus spraying him and the counter with a salvo of half-chewed food particles.

i got a new sammich, properly made. fucking punks. what's so difficult about making my goddamned sandwich?!

[Ninja Pope]

truth.

a few weeks back i was at a local jimmy john's. while ordering the #5 vito i looked the guy right in the eye and said, "light. on. the. peppers. and only of the banana kind."

i'll be damned if that fucking cunt didn't load my sandwich down with the hottest peppers they had on hand. which isn't the hottest thing ever, but when you're not expecting it... ruins the whole thing.

anyways the little fucker was snickering behind the counters with his co-workers when i took the first bite, so i went back up with the sandwich and handed it back and said, "i said LIGHT ON THE PEPPERS" with extra emphasis thus spraying him and the counter with a salvo of half-chewed food particles.

i got a new sammich, properly made. fucking punks. what's so difficult about making my goddamned sandwich?!

I hate it when people think they're too good to bother doing their "menial" job correctly. I worked in food service for a few years. I probably could've found something "better" to do for work, but instead I made sure I was the best damn cook at the restaurant. I take pride in doing my job well, whatever it happens to be. I wish these teenage punks would do the same.

[WET HOT MESS]

i never thought doing back kicks would make my legs sore.

[Ninja Pope]

i never thought doing back kicks would make my legs sore.

Are you fighting multiple ninjas simultaneously? They're supposed to dance around and only attack one at a time. Looks like I'm going to need to have a talk with these guys.

[WET HOT MESS]

no, i only wanted to firm my ass. goodness.

[Void]

i never thought doing back kicks would make my legs sore.hmmm, flexibility...

[DjAg]

I hate it when people think they're too good to bother doing their "menial" job correctly. I worked in food service for a few years. I probably could've found something "better" to do for work, but instead I made sure I was the best damn cook at the restaurant. I take pride in doing my job well, whatever it happens to be. I wish these teenage punks would do the same.

I'm still proud of going 1 week straight being dead on with my cash register... And setting the store record for the fastest average time from first scanned item to closing the drawer... Training people my second day working there... Oh, and showing the new manager (who worked there for like 3 years before her promotion) how to do her job. Shit, I had to remind her what her fucking PIN and security code were.

Life was awesome even though I was paid minimum wage and it was actually a really shitty job (Dollar Tree).

[Ninja Pope]

no, i only wanted to firm my ass. goodness.

Firming is good, but don't make it smaller. That makes Baby Jesus cry.

[WET HOT MESS]

im condensing that ass. it's expanding in an ugly way.

[NOTKyle]

I'M WATCHING A BLACK AND WHITE MOVIE TELL ME I'M COOL

[DjAg]

im condensing that ass. it's expanding in an ugly way.

All teh ladies say that. Only 9.3% are correct.

[Void]

im condensing that ass. it's expanding in an ugly way.like goatse?

[Ninja Pope]

im condensing that ass. it's expanding in an ugly way.

The term "condensing" makes me nervous too.

[WET HOT MESS]

im preventing cellulite formation!

[WET HOT MESS]

and i like my ass not to be floppy.

[WET HOT MESS]

The term "condensing" makes me nervous too.
whatever, the idea of having to play with two firm asscheeks and having to part them forcefully with both hands in order to have anal is highly erotic.

[leafsmack0]

I'm here, I'm queer, APPLES

[TylerDurden]

and i like my ass not to be floppy.

i also like your ass not to be floppy. get on with those exercises, girl. damn.

[Ninja Pope]

im preventing cellulite formation!

Well stop it! Men don't mind a little cellulite as much as women think we do. Personally, I like an ass that jiggles a bit when I smack it.

[WET HOT MESS]

you don't laik blek ppl you don't liek em

[mxlplkt]

I'M WATCHING A BLACK AND WHITE MOVIE TELL ME I'M COOL
Young Frankenstein?

[WET HOT MESS]

Is Bela Lugosi in it?

[leafsmack0]

I may just sit here and crap my pants all day

[Void]

I may just sit here and crap my pants all dayYou're into scat, I take it...

[WET HOT MESS]

Mira Sorvino is 41? When did that happen?

[DjAg]

Mira Sorvino is 41? When did that happen?

September 28th

[Ninja Pope]

Mira Sorvino is 41? When did that happen?

Probably within the last year.

[WET HOT MESS]

She looks great though.

[leafsmack0]

You're into scat, I take it...

I'm more into not moving.

[Void]

I'm more into not moving.Just move your bowels.

[TylerDurden]

i haven't seen her lately, but mira sorvino used to be on an exclusive and short list of wreckable women with whom i'd do unspeakable things with.

[Ninja Pope]

She looks great though.

Probably because she doesn't worry about her ass. The lack of stress helps her age more gracefully.

[leafsmack0]

Just move your bowels.

lol exactly

[Void]

I'm just glad she doesn't look like her daddy.

[WET HOT MESS]

I've yet to see an ugly Italian mixed girl. It doesn't seem possible.

[DjAg]

Probably because she doesn't worry about her ass. The lack of stress helps her age more gracefully.

whatever, the idea of having to play with two firm asscheeks and having to part them forcefully with both hands in order to have anal is highly erotic.

I do not know where I stand on this one, you're both so right.

[Ninja Pope]

I've yet to see an ugly Italian mixed girl. It doesn't seem possible.

Italian women have good genes to begin with. And mixing races often seems to filter out whatever "ugly" genes the parents might have had. Two ugly people of different races can produce very good-looking children.

[WET HOT MESS]

so i have to find an ugly white guy in order to make little Kristen Kreuks?

[Ninja Pope]

so i have to find an ugly white guy in order to make little Kristen Kreuks?

An ugly Dutch guy, specifically.

[WET HOT MESS]

Where's Calados?

[Void]

so i have to find an ugly white guy in order to make little Kristen Kreuks?Find an ugly black guy and make good little golfers.

[WET HOT MESS]

i dont want golfers. i want kids that are so good looking the neighbor's kids want to commit suicide.

[WET HOT MESS]

well, maybe that severe, but i want super mutts.

[WET HOT MESS]

if i do decide to have kids that is.

[Void]

if i do decide to have kids that is.You might have to sacrifice your ass-firmness.

[}{arlequin]

http://www.yoimg.com/i/322ebe637840047bdbf3dc8cf9708567-photo.jpg (http://www.yoimg.com/h/322ebe637840047bdbf3dc8cf9708567-photo.jpg.html)

[WET HOT MESS]

You might have to sacrifice your ass-firmness.
yeah, maybe when im old and have nothing left to offer this world.

[Ninja Pope]

i dont want golfers. i want kids that are so good looking the neighbor's kids want to commit suicide.

How about half-German musicians who know how to cook?

[mxlplkt]

if i do decide to have kids that is.

http://i91.photobucket.com/albums/k290/carpelite6/britbook.jpg

[WET HOT MESS]

http://www.yoimg.com/i/322ebe637840047bdbf3dc8cf9708567-photo.jpg (http://www.yoimg.com/h/322ebe637840047bdbf3dc8cf9708567-photo.jpg.html)
http://i32.tinypic.com/2vvkuxc.jpg

[TylerDurden]

yeah, maybe when im old and have nothing left to offer this world.

a pairing of you and i would yield super kids that'd make brad pitt cry from jealousy. unfortunately for you i'm retired from that game.

also, you can't have any of my money when shit inevitably goes sour. i suspect it'll be because you didn't keep your ass firm enough and i no longer had any fun prying your cheeks apart for the anal. but we'll be civil and supportive for the kids until they're old enough to put us in an old folks home. their sense of humor will have them putting us in the same home in the same room. and they'll never visit, as they'll be globe-trotting too much to make time for us. kids as beautiful as ours are invariably wrapped up in doing things that beautiful people always do, so we'll only see them on holidays or when it's time for a grandchild's birthday. fuckers will try to bleed us dry even in our old age. at some point i'll grow tired and bored, and a) set you on fire and blame it on a nasty, accidental fall down a flight of stairs, or b) hang myself.

as you can see... why bother?

[WET HOT MESS]

yeah, i'm not having sex with you.

[TylerDurden]

yeah, i'm not having sex with you.

my sexual calendar is a bit full at the moment anyways. maybe next week month year.

[Ninja Pope]

yeah, i'm not having sex with you.

Turkey baster, eh?

[WET HOT MESS]

i like sexing myself anyway. it's more fun denying myself the pleasure.

[leafsmack0]

http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b365/leafsmack0/1184656024267.jpg

[Stax]

http://i29.tinypic.com/33kptaq.gif

Giada = Win

[WET HOT MESS]

oh giada

[DjAg]

i like sexing myself anyway. it's more fun denying myself the pleasure.

Not true, many girls have told me that having sex with me is the greatest denial of all pleasure.

[Ninja Pope]

i like sexing myself anyway. it's more fun denying myself the pleasure.

PIC. CHURZ.

I agree with your second statement, in regards to the first.

[Ninja Pope]

oh giada

She has nice bewbs.

[WET HOT MESS]

how do i take a picture of myself being abstinent

[Ninja Pope]

how do i take a picture of myself being abstinent

Just take a picture of yourself naked, but not having sex.

I'm a problem solver.

[WET HOT MESS]

good idea, bad idea

[Stax]

Just take a picture of yourself naked, but not having sex.

I'm a problem solver.

DO IT